🚨 RUN, HIDE, DON’T DIE™: CISA’s Free Webinar on How Not to Get Shot (Probably) 🚨
Join CISA’s 2-hour livestream panic-prep class on January 8, 2026, at 1:00 p.m. EST because nothing says “preparedness” like watching PowerPoint slides while imagining doom. Free for 450 brave souls—register by January 7, 2026, at noon EST or until the internet crashes. 💀💻🏃♂️

Chuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports expert who peaked athletically in middle school dodgeball.
Born in Halfcourt, Indiana, Chuck spent his formative years shouting unsolicited advice at professional athletes on TV, firmly believing that his couchside coaching was the key to their success.
Chuck B. Ballsy: because in the game of sports and sarcasm, he’s always the MVP. 🏀🎤
