Cocaine, Caffeine Detected In Sharks

Cocaine, Caffeine Detected In Sharks

      

A new study revealed that sharks in the Bahamas tested positive for cocaine, caffeine, painkillers, and other substances, with such contaminants increasingly found in tourism-driven marine environments. What do you think?

“And to think my kid looks up to these sharks.”

Tristan Weiss, Dividend Calculator


“So that’s why they never stop swimming.”

Sierra Ibarra, Cloak Retailer


“If sharks need to reach out for some help I’m always available to talk.”

Joel Valentine, Flag Hoister

The post Cocaine, Caffeine Detected In Sharks appeared first on The Onion.

   A new study revealed that sharks in the Bahamas tested positive for cocaine, caffeine, painkillers, and other substances, with such contaminants increasingly found in tourism-driven marine environments. What do you think?
The post Cocaine, Caffeine Detected In Sharks appeared first on The Onion. Read More

Finn

Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.

Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.

Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.

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