ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President DJT wants Iran added to Russian Sanctions Bill
The latest TRANSMISSION from THE ORANGE ORACLE has been received, and it’s a doozy. In a shocking turn of events,…
Month: July 2026
Tech Giants Argue With EU Over Who Gets To Boss You Around
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The European Commission is trying to level the playing field in…
Tom Cruise Unrecognizable Again Because That’s All He’s Got Left
Because the world was just missing a film where Tom Cruise plays a billionaire businessman who causes an environmental calamity…
Jason Newsted saves music by playing Fairies Wear Boots with Blackberry Smoke in Farmington Pennsylvania
Oh boy, folks, are you ready for some earth-shattering news? 🤯 I mean, I can barely contain my excitement. Former…
ARCH ENEMY survives first show with new singer somehow
Oh boy, are you ready for some melodramatic metal news? 🤯 ARCH ENEMY just kicked off their summer 2026 European…
Zendaya’s Hairstylist Spills the Tea That She’s a Total Boss Who Won’t Let Him Get Away with Any Old Messy Bun
Let’s talk about hair, because, clearly, it’s the most important thing in life 🙄. I mean, who needs world peace…
Universal Executes Brilliant Plan To Annoy Entire Neighborhood With Fast Ride
Because what’s a theme park attraction without a few noise complaints from the neighbors, right? Universal Studios Hollywood’s latest addition,…
Riot Grrrl Pioneer Jennifer Finch Loses Brave Fight Against Brain Cancer Because Thats How It Always Goes
Oh no, the music world is literally ending: L7 bassist Jennifer Finch has passed away at 59 🤯. I mean,…
Maine Democrats Nominate Guy Not Named Susan Collins
So, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest developments in the Maine Senate race, and I’ve got to…
Netanyahu Might Get Arrested in New York Because Why Not
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani is still considering arresting Israeli…