ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Congressman Paul Gosar gets endorsement for re-election bid
The ORANGE ORACLE has spoken, and the people are rejoicing. In a recent TRANSMISSION on Truth Social, THE FLORIDA MESSIAH…
Month: July 2026
Alienware peddles overpriced monitors to nostalgic gamers again
Because apparently we haven’t milked this franchise enough yet, Alienware and Dell are celebrating their 30th anniversary with a new…
Secret Service Urges Trump Not To Use Qatari-Gifted Jet Pack
WASHINGTON—Despite protestations from the White House that the propulsion system was fully safe to operate, the Secret Service on Friday…
ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Andy Biggs gets endorsement for Arizona governor
The ORANGE ORACLE has spoken, and the people of Arizona are eagerly awaiting the wisdom of COMMANDER OF CAPS LOCK.…
ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Endorses Zach Lahn for Iowa Governor with Total Support
The ORANGE ORACLE has spoken, and the people of Iowa should rejoice. In a recent TRANSMISSION on Truth Social, THE…
Homer’s Epic Poem Gets New Translation Ahead of Nolan Film
The recent announcement of Christopher Nolan’s movie adaptation of The Odyssey has sparked new interest in the original text, an…
White House Gets New Front Door Because Security Was Too Easy
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The White House is getting a security upgrade, and I’m not…
World Cup Reinvigorates Nation’s Interest In Kicking Things
WASHINGTON—Having been provided with a powerful reminder that legs were not merely for standing around on, millions of Americans…
Jack White Saves Twin Temple From Tour Ejection with New Gig
Satanic doo-wop duo Twin Temple were kicked off of country singer Charley Crockett’s tour due to their Satanic imagery, only…
Huey Lewis Steps Away From Music Scene Completely Now
Huey Lewis confirmed during a recent podcast appearance that he has been “basically deaf” for nearly nine years after living…