Concerned Citizens Launch GoFundMe Launched To Help Sydney Sweeney Buy Some Clothes
U.S. — Concerned Americans have started a GoFundMe to purchase some clothing for the obviously destitute Sydney Sweeney. Read…
Day: September 19, 2026
Orville Peck Talks Football Player Romance
Orville Peck apparently made some off-field contact with the Raiders — by way of a kiss. On the song “Ring…
ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President Donald J Trump proposes Superior Intelligence term
The ORANGE ORACLE has spoken, and the nation is once again abuzz with the latest TRANSMISSION from the Commander of…
Report: Chili’s Only Gets Bad Rap Because It Is Awful
DALLAS, TX — A new industry report released Thursday concluded that Chili’s persistent reputation problem is due to it…
Uber Driver Carefully Selects Worst Possible Photo For Profile
SAN ANTONIO, TX — Local Uber driver Vish Patel spent hours today searching his phone for the worst possible…
Comedian Carrot Top Hospitalized After Suicide Attempt
Carrot Top was hospitalized in Las Vegas on Friday night following a suicide attempt. A representative for the actor and…
TIFF 2026 Review: Fjord – Because Who Needs Explosions When You Have Renate Reinsve and Sebastian Stan Staring Deeply Into Each Other’s Eyes for 2 Hours
The most epic and dramatic tale of a fjord, because who doesn’t love a good story about a body of…
Obama Family Dog Passes Away
Former President Barack Obama announced that his family’s Portuguese water dog Sunny, which they got in 2013 during their…
Because What Movies Really Need Is More Ego Stroking Celebrity Cameos Apparently
When a TV show reaches a certain level of cultural consciousness, it’s like a switch flips and suddenly everyone who’s…
Metal Legends Too Old To Tour Without Naps
Oh no, the sky is falling! 🌪️ FORBIDDEN’s bassist Matt Camacho and drummer Chris Kontos are sitting out their upcoming…