Oh, Scooter Braun, the guy who used to manage Justin Bieber, is now saying everything’s totally fine between them, even though Bieber unfollowed him and basically his entire original team 🤣. Yeah, sure, Scooter, we totally believe you. It’s not like Ariana Grande, Demi Lovato, and Tori Kelly all ran for the hills around the same time, right? 🤔 Must be a coincidence! 🙄
So, Scooter “I discovered Bieber on YouTube” Braun (as if we could forget) is now doing interviews where he claims everything is peachy keen with the Biebs. 🍑 He’s like, “We achieved amazing things! I’m so proud!” Translation: “I made a boatload of money off that kid!” 💰💰💰
And then he goes on about how Bieber probably wants to “show that he can do it on his own.” 😇 Oh, bless his heart. As if Bieber suddenly had an epiphany and decided he didn’t need Scooter’s genius anymore. More like Scooter’s grip was loosening, and Bieber saw an escape route. 🏃♂️💨
“Myself and everyone from the old team is rooting for him,” Scooter adds. Sure, Scooter, we believe you. They’re all just sitting around, twiddling their thumbs, hoping Bieber doesn’t completely implode without their “guidance.” 😂
But wait, there’s more! Scooter also wants to remind us that he’s still relevant by name-dropping Ariana Grande and her *Wicked* gig. 🧙♀️ “To see Ariana with what’s happened with *Wicked*… it’s awesome!” he says. Translation: “Look at me! I used to manage her! I’m still important!” 🤡
And Tori Kelly? Yeah, he mentions her too. Because who could forget Tori Kelly? 🎤 (No offense, Tori, but let’s be real).
Of course, the article mentions that rumors of a rift persist online. 🙄 As if anyone with half a brain cell believes Scooter’s PR spin. The internet never lies, right? 🤥
Now, Scooter is the CEO of HYBE America, home to BTS. 🎤🇰🇷 So, he’s basically trying to ride the K-pop wave now. Smart move, Scooter. Gotta stay relevant somehow. 😎
And let’s not forget the gallery of “Celebrity Friendships That Imploded.” 😂 Perfect timing, PopCrush. Subtlety is key, right? 🔑
So, there you have it. Scooter Braun, the master of spin, trying to convince us that everything is fine. Don’t worry, Scooter, we’re not buying it. 🙅♀️ We’re just here for the drama. 🍿
Chuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports expert who peaked athletically in middle school dodgeball.
Born in Halfcourt, Indiana, Chuck spent his formative years shouting unsolicited advice at professional athletes on TV, firmly believing that his couchside coaching was the key to their success.
Chuck B. Ballsy: because in the game of sports and sarcasm, he’s always the MVP. 🏀🎤
