Oh, great, another movie. 🙄 MUBI, bless their little arthouse hearts, has graced us with not one, but TWO new posters for Die My Love. Because one wasn’t enough to prepare us for whatever cinematic masterpiece Lynne Ramsay (of We Need to Talk About Kevin fame – you know, that movie that made you question your own reproductive choices) has concocted. Prepare yourselves for a cinematic experience so profound, you’ll question the meaning of life, love, and whether or not you should have just stayed home and watched cat videos. 😹
So, the film, which I’m sure is going to be a laugh riot, will be premiering at the BFI London Film Festival on October 17th. Mark your calendars, or don’t, I really don’t care. Then, it’ll be unleashed upon the unsuspecting public in cinemas across the UK and Ireland on November 7th. Lucky them. 🍀 Apparently, it already made its debut at the Cannes Film Festival earlier this year. No word on whether or not anyone walked out, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed.🤞
Here’s a synopsis that’s so deep, it could give the Mariana Trench a run for its money:
> A hopeful young and loving couple (Grace and Jackson) move from New York to an inherited house in the country. Grace tries to find her identity with a new baby in the isolated environment. Yet as she begins to unravel, it’s not in weakness but imagination, strength and a stunning untamed vivacity that she discovers herself anew.
Right, because moving to the countryside ALWAYS leads to self-discovery and untamed vivacity. Never mind the crippling isolation, the lack of decent Wi-Fi, and the constant fear of being murdered by a scarecrow. 🤡
Set in rural America, because apparently, all the best existential crises happen in fields of wheat, Die My Love is described as “a portrait of a woman engulfed by love and madness.” Sounds about right. It stars Jennifer Lawrence (who, let’s be honest, probably needed a paycheck), Robert Pattinson (who apparently has a thing for indie films that make you want to gouge your eyes out), LaKeith Stanfield (because every movie needs a token LaKeith Stanfield), Nick Nolte (because why not?), and Sissy Spacek (who I’m convinced is immortal). 🧟♀️
Lynne Ramsay’s previous “achievements” include Ratcatcher (because who doesn’t love a movie about rats?), Morvern Callar (starring Samantha Morton, who is legally required to appear in at least one depressing British film per year), We Need To Talk About Kevin (the aforementioned movie that will make you question everything), Swimmer (a short film about swimming, I guess?), You Were Never Really Here (starring Joaquin Phoenix, who probably spent the entire shoot wondering where his life went wrong), and Brigitte (part of some fancy-pants Miu Miu series that I’m sure is very important). 💅
So, there you have it. Die My Love. A movie that promises to be either a groundbreaking masterpiece or a complete train wreck. Either way, it’ll give film critics something to write about, and that’s all that really matters, right? 🤷♀️
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
