Is Elon Musk The Father Of Your Child? Signs To Look For
According to reports, billionaire entrepreneur Elon Musk has a lot of kids, with an estimated three dozen Musk-sired children being…
Day: February 17, 2025
Deranged Maniac Fires Off Over 17 Memes In Crowded German Shopping Mall
HAMBURG — Chaos erupted and hundreds fled in a German city once again today, after what witnesses described as a…
WINNING: Trump Announces Plan To Attack The British And Prussian Forces At Waterloo
WASHINGTON, D.C. — America’s resurgence reached a new level this morning, as President Donald Trump announced a plan to attack…
Impoverished Man Only Has Two Computer Monitors
PALO ALTO, CA — According to sources, a local impoverished man only has two computer monitors on his desk in…
Audit Reveals All Fort Knox Gold Replaced With IOUs
FORT KNOX, KY — An audit by the Department Of Government Efficiency has revealed that all the heavy gold bars…
It Almost Weirder That Grown Man On Roblox Isn’t Grooming Children
Read MoreThe OnionSEATTLE—Voicing concern about the adult’s aberrant behavior, sources confirmed Monday that it was almost weirder that Richard Shea,…
🧐🎮 60% of Civilization 7 players have no clue what they’re doing — but they’re still winning!
A shocking scandal has rocked the gaming community! 😱 According to a recent leak, fewer than 40% of Civilization 7…