Oh my freaking god, you guys! 🙄 Look what I found! Some old dudes playing music at some festival called Hellfest. 🤣 It’s BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION, or as I like to call them, “The Geriatric Rock Squad.” 😂 Seriously, who even listens to these guys anymore? 👴👵
Here’s the setlist, if you’re into that sort of thing:
00:00 Intro (Because every band needs a dramatic entrance, even if they’re just walking on stage) 🚶♂️
00:44 Sway (I bet their hips don’t sway like they used to. 👴)
05:54 One Last Soul (More like “One Last Tour,” am I right? 🤣)
10:14 Wanderlust (Wandering where their Zimmer frames are, probably. 🧓)
18:02 The Outsider (Yeah, because they’re sooooo relevant in today’s music scene. 🙄)
22:47 Red Sun (Maybe they should put on some sunscreen? 🧴 Just sayin’.)
31:37 Save Me (From this boring music, please! 🙏)
39:07 Band Introduction (As if anyone doesn’t know who these dinosaurs are. 🦖)
40:43 The Crow (More like “The Old Crows,” LOL! 🤣)
46:46 Stay Free (Stay free from hearing this garbage. 🗑️)
52:25 Black Country (I bet their country club is nicer. ⛳)
57:21 Outro (Finally! My ears are bleeding. 🩸)
So, BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION is this “supergroup” featuring Glenn Hughes (who used to be in DEEP PURPLE and BLACK SABBATH – ancient history, people! 📜), Joe Bonamassa (guitar dude who thinks he’s still cool 😎), Jason Bonham (son of some other old dude from LED ZEPPELIN 🎸), and Derek Sherinian (keyboardist who’s probably wondering where his career went wrong. 🤔).
They’re currently on a European tour, playing headline shows and festivals. 😴 Whoopee! 🎉 I’m sure the retirement homes are thrilled. 🏘️
They’re touring in support of their fifth studio album, “V” (because “5” is too mainstream, I guess? 🤷♀️), which came out in June 2024. I’m sure it’s full of the same old tired riffs and clichés. 😴
Apparently, “V” is a “testament” to their “growth” and “mutual admiration.” 🤮 I’m pretty sure it’s just a testament to their ability to keep milking their past glories. 🐄
Bonamassa says the band allows him to “embrace all of it.” 🙄 I bet “all of it” includes a hefty royalty check. 💰 He also says everyone brings something “specific” to the band. Yeah, like hearing aids and Metamucil. 💊
Hughes adds that they make music for “the five of us.” 🙄 Well, that explains why nobody else likes it. 🤣 Sherinian credits producer Kevin Shirley for keeping them focused. I bet Kevin Shirley is just trying to collect a paycheck before these guys kick the bucket. ⚰️
Shirley says “V” is a “monumental chapter” in their career. 🤣 More like a footnote. He also says it has “hooks!” 🎣 Yeah, hooks to reel in the geriatric crowd. He calls it the “benchmark” for BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION. I think the benchmark was set, like, 40 years ago. 🕰️ Glenn agrees, saying they had a “magical recording” experience. I’m sure the magic was just the relief of finishing it. ✨
Their lead single, “Stay Free,” is a “powerhouse track” that channels the spirit of AC/DC and LED ZEPPELIN. 🤣 Yeah, if AC/DC and LED ZEPPELIN were playing in a nursing home. 🏥
Since 2010, they’ve delivered a series of “critically acclaimed” albums. 🤣 By “critically acclaimed,” they mean their moms liked them. Their return with “V” reaffirms their status as “rock royalty.” 👑 More like rock fossils. 💀
Shirley says their camaraderie is “immediately evident.” Yeah, the camaraderie of cashing those checks together. 💰 He also says the music sounds like “this band, and nothing else sounds like it.” That’s because nobody else wants to sound like it. 😂
“V” is a “milestone” that celebrates their “journey, talent, and vision.” I think it’s just a desperate attempt to stay relevant. 🤷♀️ They invite fans to join them in experiencing the “depth and power” of “V”. I’d rather experience the depth and power of a root canal. 🦷
Hughes says the new material sounds like BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION. 🙄 No surprises there. He also says the vibe in the camp has never been so “friendly and fun.” I bet they’re just happy to still be alive. 🥳
Bonamassa says BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION has a “very specific thing that it does.” Yeah, it puts people to sleep. 😴
Joe claims he brought them back together. I bet his bank account told him to. 🤑 He says Glenn couldn’t do anything until his DEAD DAISIES situation was resolved. Who even cares about THE DEAD DAISIES? 🌼
Joe says the songwriting process was the “same.” 🙄 I bet they just recycled old riffs. They sat in the courtyard with an acoustic guitar and “bashed out the arrangement.” Sounds like a blast. 😒
Joe says there aren’t a lot of overdubs because Glenn‘s bass sound is “so big and distorted.” Yeah, like his hearing. 👂 He compares playing in the band to FREE. I think FREE would be insulted. 😠
In an interview, Bonamassa says he likes being in a band because he doesn’t have to “front it” or “sing all the time.” So, he’s just lazy? 🤔 He also says being the person in front requires being an “entertainer.” Yeah, and Bonamassa is about as entertaining as watching paint dry. 🎨
BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION‘s inception took place when Hughes and Bonamassa fused their styles on stage. I bet it was a train wreck. 🚂 With the help of Shirley, they added Bonham and Sherinian. The rest is history…that nobody remembers. 🤷♂️
In an interview, Hughes talked about the chemistry between the members. I think the chemistry is just the shared experience of being old and washed up. 👴👵
Glenn says the band was “meant to be.” I think it was meant to be forgotten. 🤷♂️ He says these four guys are the “right guys” to play in the band. Yeah, the right guys to collect social security checks together. 💰
And there you have it, folks! BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION, the band that time forgot. 🕰️ Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go listen to some real music. 🎧 Peace out! ✌️
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
