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Month: September 2025

Gerard Butler and Morena Baccarin, Still Alive, Still Dumb, and Still Searching for a Place to Live in ‘Greenland 2: Migration’ Trailer
Breaking, Movie News

Gerard Butler and Morena Baccarin, Still Alive, Still Dumb, and Still Searching for a Place to Live in ‘Greenland 2: Migration’ Trailer

FinnSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Oh, sweet! Another disaster movie starring Gerard Butler? 🙄 You know, because the world *totally* needed a sequel to “Greenland.”…

Tom Keifer Reveals the Mind-Blowing Secret to Success: Simply Refuse to Quit
Breaking, Music News

Tom Keifer Reveals the Mind-Blowing Secret to Success: Simply Refuse to Quit

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

In a recent, earth-shattering 🤯 interview with Deanne Coffin (who???), CINDERELLA frontman Tom Keifer, now rebranded as a solo act…

DRONES DISRUPT DENMARK: ARE THEY DELIVERING DANISH PASTRIES OR DOOM
Elephant Reads CNN

DRONES DISRUPT DENMARK: ARE THEY DELIVERING DANISH PASTRIES OR DOOM

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Folks, you won’t BELIEVE what the liberal, globalist lapdogs at CNN are peddling now! “Drones over Danish airports” – sounds…

Pilot forgot to close the window, almost became a bird | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Pilot forgot to close the window, almost became a bird | CNN

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Another day, another liberal conspiracy foiled, folks! CNN is trying to scare you with a “rogue window” on a Delta…

CNN’s Guide to Taking Pictures (as if you needed their help)
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN’s Guide to Taking Pictures (as if you needed their help)

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Oh, CNN, still obsessed with “thought-provoking” images while our REAL President, Donald J. Trump, is busy making America great again!…

Amazon coughs up chump change after *accidentally* tricking grandma into Prime for life
Elephant Reads CNN

Amazon coughs up chump change after *accidentally* tricking grandma into Prime for life

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump and his administration! The Trump-Vance FTC just smacked Amazon with a $2.5 billion…

Vance Did WHAT Now? CNN Tries to Fact-Check a Joke (Spoiler: They Fail Hilariously)
Elephant Reads CNN

Vance Did WHAT Now? CNN Tries to Fact-Check a Joke (Spoiler: They Fail Hilariously)

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Oh, the tangled web the liberal media weaves! Apparently, Vice President Vance is now under fire for daring to suggest…

Office Adds Area For Lactating Mothers To Discreetly Pump Iron
The Onion

Office Adds Area For Lactating Mothers To Discreetly Pump Iron

FinnSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

    Read MoreThe OnionTUCSON, AZ—In a move that has earned praise from women’s rights advocates, local business Leiderman Insurance reportedly unveiled…

Ammo Company Unveils New Giant Shell Casing With More Room For Left-Wing Terrorists To Write Out All Their Motives In Detail
Babylon Bee

Ammo Company Unveils New Giant Shell Casing With More Room For Left-Wing Terrorists To Write Out All Their Motives In Detail

FinnSeptember 25, 2025

U.S. — In a move to capitalize on the current heightened volatility of the political climate, one ammunition manufacturer unveiled…

LOL, Alan Greenspan and a Bunch of Other Old Fed Dudes Beg Supreme Court: Please Don’t Fire Lisa Cook
Elephant Reads CNN

LOL, Alan Greenspan and a Bunch of Other Old Fed Dudes Beg Supreme Court: Please Don’t Fire Lisa Cook

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Another day, another Deep State conspiracy! The liberal media (CNN, of course) is hyperventilating because President Trump tried to fire…

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Latest posts

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  • Lea Michele Shows Off Ability To Make Co-Star Cry On Command
  • Fake news saying Trump can’t spin Iran deal as huge win somehow
  • Vance blasts Iran deal with rightful American skepticism and distrust always

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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