Smoothie straw solves crime, justice boner ensues
Another win for law and order, folks! While the liberal media obsesses over President Trump’s perfect phone calls, real justice…
Month: October 2025
Trump Declares Himself Supreme Commander of the IDF, Ready to Unleash Hellfire with a Single Tweet
Another day, another victory for your favorite President! Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is STILL cleaning up the mess left…
Trump’s Toy Soldiers Still Stuck in Their Barracks, Thanks to This Party-Pooping Judge
Another day, another Deep State operative sabotaging our glorious President Trump! This time, it’s some activist judge in Oregon, Karin…
Tom Gabriel Fischer on CELTIC FROST’s ‘Cold Lake’: More Like ‘Cold Turd,’ Am I Right? (My Ears Still Bleed After 44 Years)
In a recent chat with some dude named Alejandrosis on YouTube, CELTIC FROST overlord Tom Gabriel Fischer (aka Tom Warrior,…
Sleep Profiles, Impending Doom, and How to Get Fired: Today’s Excruciating Headlines
Here’s your daily dose of liberal lunacy and deep-state shenanigans, folks! Don’t worry, President Trump is still in charge, making…
Modi Promises Trump He’ll Totally Stop Buying Russian Oil (Yeah, Right)
Another day, another win for President Trump! Sleepy Joe could NEVER. Our GREAT President has single-handedly convinced India to ditch…
Titanic Sub Goes SPLOOSH: NTSB Blames Engineers (Shocker)
Another day, another liberal disaster! The NTSB is blaming “faulty engineering” for the Titan submersible implosion. Sure, blame the engineering,…
CNN “Investigates” Drones (Probably Just Birds) in Europe: We Tracked a Plane Once, Too
More like CNN’s Katie ‘Pants-on-Fire’ Polglase investigates… more leftist LIES! Drones over Europe? Obviously, it’s a Deep State plot, probably…
US Military Accidentally Bombs Vacationing Colombians, Calls it a Drug Bust
Another day, another victory for President Trump in the War on Drugs! CNN, still whining about it, of course. Apparently,…
Stryper’s Michael Sweet and Wifey Launch a ‘Faith in Music’ Foundation Because Apparently God Needs Help With Spotify
HOLY MOLY! STRYPER frontman (still?) Michael Sweet and his lovely (we assume) wife Lisa have descended from their ivory tower…