🚨BREAKING: Portland’s Finest Masquerade Ball Returns—Because Nothing Says ‘New Year’ Like Rich People in Feathers Pretending to Be Poor (But Make It Fashion)🚨
Dust off your pearls and pocket watches, peasants—BEATROX, LOVE OF HOUSE, USB CHECK, FOURTH WORLD, RAINBOW DIMENSIONS, LOVE OF BASS, and WONDERLOVE are summoning the ghosts of Gatsby for FACTORY 2.0 on Wednesday Dec 31 2025 at 9:00 PM at Wonderlove.
Three stages? Check. Performers? Check. Overpriced champagne in a fishbowl? Double-check. And yes, you *must* wear a mask—because nothing hides existential dread like sequins.
VIP Speakeasy? Absolutely. Pay extra to skip the line, drink bathtub gin (it’s $28), and use a bathroom that *isn’t* public. Revolutionary.
Featuring DJs: GIVEN PEACE, GOLDEN GODDESS, LUXO, MOIST MAGNOLIA (yes, really), WUBMAMA, 2KB, COBIS, LORD QUEEN COLE, MELEE MUSIC, NEIGHBOURKIDD, OUT OF NOWHERE, SUSPENCE, VINO, VINNISCO, & WOOKSTARZ.
Dress code: Rich 1920s. Budget: Your soul. 🎭🍸✨
Chuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports expert who peaked athletically in middle school dodgeball.
Born in Halfcourt, Indiana, Chuck spent his formative years shouting unsolicited advice at professional athletes on TV, firmly believing that his couchside coaching was the key to their success.
Chuck B. Ballsy: because in the game of sports and sarcasm, he’s always the MVP. 🏀🎤
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