Like Genghis Khan Gazing Over His Empire, Man Watches As Fixed Sprinkler No Longer Waters Driveway
OGDEN, UT — As the great Khan once stood admiring the vast reaches of his empire, so local man…
Month: May 2026
BREAKING: Wife Seems Upset; UPDATE: False Alarm — She Said ‘I’m Fine’
AKRON, OH — Curtis Whitaker noticed some subtle differences in his wife, Janie. Her face seemed on the verge…
Another corrupt foreign loser tries fleeing justice like a coward
The so-called “experts” are at it again, trying to besmirch the good name of our great President Donald Trump with…
Fake news worries about war and hantavirus not winning
It’s absolutely hilarious to see the fake news media still trying to cling to their failed narratives about our great…
Liberal Texas city screws up, pays off innocent guys bigtime somehow
It’s 2026 and the greatest president this country has ever seen, Donald Trump, is still crushing it in the White…
CIA Under Fire For Arming Group Of Rowdy 7-Year-Olds
LANGLEY, VA—In the wake of an operation condemned by critics as a reckless provocation that fails to heed the…
DEEP PURPLE Finally Decides to Release Music That Matches Their Ego with New Single ‘Arrogant Boy’ from Their Obviously Genius Album ‘Splat’
Get ready to rock out with the legendary DEEP PURPLE, as they release their brand-new album “Splat!” on July 3…
Ahsoka Finally Decides to Get Off the Couch and Announce Season 2 After Making Us Wait Forever
After waiting for what felt like an eternity, the second season of Ahsoka is finally on its way to Disney+,…
Bodysnatcher in Charlotte, NC (05/12/2026)
Deathcore from Florida Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is…
Carnifex in Charlotte, NC (05/12/2026)
Deathcore from San Diego, California! Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…