🚨 BREAKING: Scientology’s Annual Holiday Hoedown Returns to Prove They’re Just Like Us (Except Richer and More Structured) 🚨
⛸️❄️ Glide dangerously close to normalcy at Ice Skating! 🎅🎁 Snap pics with a man in red—no auditing required (yet). 🎨😊 Face painting: because who *wouldn’t* want a elf with questionable eyeliner? 🍪✨ Decorate cookies before they’re confiscated for “energy balancing.” 🎈🏰 Bouncy houses: bounce freely, just not into any 12-step programs!
🎁🎄 Toy giveaway: free plastic junk, just like Christmas… but with more LRH subliminals.
📍 4810 W. Sunset Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90027
📅 Saturday, December 20, 2025
⏰ 12:00 PM – 4:00 PM
Hosted by the Church of Scientology—because nothing says “holiday cheer” like a nonprofit with a fleet of cruise ships. RSVP now before they audit your guest list! 🎄🎅🎁
