Ah, Game Con Canada, the place where dreams go to die and indie devs desperately shill their wares! 🤪 Bloober Team, those purveyors of jump scare mediocrity, are gracing us with their presence to showcase Cronos: The New Dawn. Apparently, they think this is “riskier and more ambitious.” Bless their hearts. Someone get these guys a participation trophy. 🏆
We managed to snag a chat with Jacek Zieba, Game Director and professional over-promiser, about this “masterpiece.” He babbled about debuting in front of Canadian fans and how the project evolved from “two competing ideas.” Oh, the drama! 🎭 Two ideas?! Groundbreaking! He also mentioned 1980s Poland, because nothing screams “horror” like a bleak, grey landscape and questionable fashion choices. 🧥
So, Game Con Canada is having its first studio showcase. Big whoop. 🎉 Jacek says they’re “thrilled and excited” to be part of it. Translation: they’re hoping to get some free publicity and maybe, just maybe, sell a few copies. He claims sharing Cronos with the Canadian community is “huge” for them. Sure, Jan. 🙄
When asked how they got involved, Jacek admitted they were INVITED. Gasp! 😮 Apparently, they couldn’t resist the “fantastic opportunity.” What can attendees expect? A trailer and a “little surprise.” Probably some cheap merch and a promise that the game is totally, definitely, absolutely going to be good this time. 🤞
Cronos: The New Dawn is a mishmash of time travel, post-apocalyptic horror, and Eastern European history. How original! 🙄 Jacek says it started with “two separate pitches.” One about Eastern Europe and a “strange disease,” and the other about time travel. They decided to “merge them into one pitch!” Mind. Blown. 🤯 And apparently, the “basic fundamentals” are still in the game. So, it’s not evolved much. They just “make it true.” Whatever that means. 🤔
They set the game in 1980s Poland because…reasons? Jacek claims it was a time of “deep political unrest and uncertainty.” So, basically, the perfect backdrop for a game that will probably be about as scary as a wet sock. 🧦 He also mentions Nowa Huta, a “model socialist city” that’s “almost a character in itself.” I bet it’s just as charming as it sounds. 🙄
Time travel is “notoriously hard to wrangle,” but fear not! Jacek has a plan. They decided “HOW our time travel should work” and then, get this, they STUCK TO IT. 🤯 He also recommends watching DARK on Netflix. Because nothing says “originality” like ripping off someone else’s idea. 💡
The Orphans are “disturbing and somehow tragically human.” Jacek asks, “How a monster created only from human flesh can look like?” Deep thoughts, man. 🧘♂️ He also wonders if they “still think they are human.” These are the questions that keep us up at night. 🌃 He doesn’t want to “spoil too much now.” Because nothing kills the hype like actually knowing what you’re getting into. 🤫
The protagonist wears “bulky diving gear.” It’s “almost ritualistic.” Apparently, he’s an “Agent of the enigmatic Collective” and carries “The Harvester,” a device that can “reach through time itself.” Sounds legit. 👍

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