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Day: October 24, 2025

Mamdani’s Weepy Sermon: My Faith’s Great, Cuomo’s the Devil
Elephant Reads CNN

Mamdani’s Weepy Sermon: My Faith’s Great, Cuomo’s the Devil

Big ElephantOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Looks like the radical left is pulling out all the stops in New York! We’ve got Zohran Mamdani, the Democratic…

Jennifer Hale Yearns to Return as Shepard in Mass Effect 5, Begs BioWare for a Call
Breaking, Games News

Jennifer Hale Yearns to Return as Shepard in Mass Effect 5, Begs BioWare for a Call

Pixel P. SnarkbyteOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Wow, hold on to your Omni-tools, folks! Jennifer Hale, the voice actress for everyone’s favorite space lesbian (or space dude,…

CS2 Update Makes Skins So Cheap, You Can Afford a Real Vacation Now
Breaking, Games News

CS2 Update Makes Skins So Cheap, You Can Afford a Real Vacation Now

Pixel P. SnarkbyteOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Ah, Counter-Strike 2 skins. Those oh-so-precious digital baubles that separate the pros from the noobs (and their wallets from their…

Bob Odenkirk’s face + Ben Wheatley’s weirdness = “Normal” (yeah, right)
Breaking

Bob Odenkirk’s face + Ben Wheatley’s weirdness = “Normal” (yeah, right)

FinnOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Oh, sweet merciful carp! 🎣 Another Bob Odenkirk flick? Seriously? Is this guy contractually obligated to be in EVERYTHING? Someone…

From West Wing to East Wing: Bradley Whitford Trades Oval Office for…Diplomacy (yawn) | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

From West Wing to East Wing: Bradley Whitford Trades Oval Office for…Diplomacy (yawn) | CNN

Big ElephantOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Another Hollywood leftist, Bradley Whitford, pretends to be a diplomat while trashing our REAL diplomat, President Trump! I’m sure “The…

CNN “Fact Check” Tries to Defend Jen Psaki’s Honor by Hilariously Claiming She Didn’t REALLY Mean What She Said
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN “Fact Check” Tries to Defend Jen Psaki’s Honor by Hilariously Claiming She Didn’t REALLY Mean What She Said

Big ElephantOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by the radical Democrats to smear our glorious President Trump! They’re clutching at straws, folks,…

Wedding Planner Gingerly Asks Taylor Swift If She’s Considered Dance Lessons
The Onion

Wedding Planner Gingerly Asks Taylor Swift If She’s Considered Dance Lessons

FinnOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

    Read MoreThe OnionNEW YORK—Attempting to broach the sensitive subject as delicately as possible, Taylor Swift’s wedding planner reportedly asked the…

Man Achieves Lifelong Dream Of Being In Boarding Group 2
Babylon Bee

Man Achieves Lifelong Dream Of Being In Boarding Group 2

FinnOctober 24, 2025

ATLANTA, GA — Traveler Dale Galveston achieved a lifelong dream of boarding a plane in Boarding Group 2 at the…

REAGAN AD: TRUMP’S ‘RAGE’ REVEALED (SPOILER: IT’S ABOUT REAGAN, DUH)
Elephant Reads CNN

REAGAN AD: TRUMP’S ‘RAGE’ REVEALED (SPOILER: IT’S ABOUT REAGAN, DUH)

Big ElephantOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

Fake News CNN is at it again, folks! They’re trying to make President Trump look bad for canceling trade negotiations…

AEROSMITH, YUNGBLUD, and STEVE MARTIN Team Up For ‘My Only Angel’ Remake – Prepare to be Confused
Breaking, Music News

AEROSMITH, YUNGBLUD, and STEVE MARTIN Team Up For ‘My Only Angel’ Remake – Prepare to be Confused

Chord F. DiscordOctober 24, 2025October 24, 2025

So, like, AEROSMITH, those dudes who haven’t been relevant since your grandpa’s dentures were shiny and new, and Yungblud, who…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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