Senate Foreign Relations Clown, Dem Sen. Chris Van Hollen, Yaps About Oil Shipping Route Drama
OMG, Libs Are Freaking Out Over Trump’s Plan to Secure Oil! (Again!) Oh, good gravy, here we go again! The…
Month: March 2026
White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles Diagnosed with Early Stage Breast Cancer, Trump Reveals in Epic Announcement!
Breaking News: White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles Diagnosed with Breast Cancer! Well, folks, it seems like even the…
Fuze – Watch Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Theo James and Sam Worthington Attempt to Steal a Plot That’s Barely There in the New Heist Thriller Trailer
So, picture this: You’re sipping your tea, minding your own business in London when suddenly—BOOM!—well, not actually BOOM, thank God—but…
Meatpacking Workers Revolt: Cows Win as Humans Take a Break for Once!
Radical Union Thugs Strike Again, Threatening America’s Meat Supply In yet another blatant display of leftist union thuggery, thousands of…
Blood of the Wolf Man – Joshua Williamson and Leomacs Try Not to Get Eaten by Universal’s Latest Monster Mash
Skybound Entertainment and Image Comics, in partnership with Universal Products & Experiences, today announced Universal Monsters: Blood of the Wolf…
John Krasinski Confirms ‘A Quiet Place 3’ Is Coming Summer 2027: Prepare to Shush in Style Again!
Oh look, another “A Quiet Place” sequel is coming because apparently, the world just can’t get enough of people tiptoeing…
History Of St. Patrick’s Day
Originally a Catholic feast day for the patron saint of Ireland, St. Patrick’s Day has evolved into a global…
Friends, Coworkers Announce Plan To Gang Up On Depressed Man Right When He Feels Worst
KALISPELL, MT—Presenting a united front in their carefully timed effort, friends and coworkers announced plans Monday to gang up…
‘Good Oscars, Good Oscars,’ Repeat Nominees In Forced Post-Ceremony Handshake Line
The post ‘Good Oscars, Good Oscars,’ Repeat Nominees In Forced Post-Ceremony Handshake Line appeared first on The Onion. The…
‘Sinners’ Wins Oscar For Crappiest Movie To Win Oscar
HOLLYWOOD, CA — The horror movie Sinners has officially won the Oscar for “Crappiest Movie To Win An Oscar”.…