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Month: July 2026

LeBron James: ‘I’m Taking My Receding Hairline to Philly’
Babylon Bee

LeBron James: ‘I’m Taking My Receding Hairline to Philly’

FinnJuly 25, 2026

    LOS ANGELES, CA — LeBron James has made the final free agency decision of his career, announcing that he…

Grandma’s wild arrest was fake reality TV gold
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Grandma’s wild arrest was fake reality TV gold

Big ElephantJuly 25, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. So, Donna Dillon and her husband were just chillin’ at home,…

Bret Michaels Trades Stage for Surgery Room
Live, Music News

Bret Michaels Trades Stage for Surgery Room

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 25, 2026

Bret Michaels has had a hell of a week, going from show to show and following one concert with a…

Trump’s Correspondents’ Dinner Speech Turns Huge Disaster
Live

Trump’s Correspondents’ Dinner Speech Turns Huge Disaster

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 25, 2026

The 2023 White House Correspondents’ Dinner took place at the Waldorf Astoria in Washington, D.C., with Donald Trump in attendance,…

Wells Fargo Explains That Yes, They Gave All Your Money To A Hobo Named Frank, But Will Make Things Right By Coming To Your House To Murder You
Babylon Bee

Wells Fargo Explains That Yes, They Gave All Your Money To A Hobo Named Frank, But Will Make Things Right By Coming To Your House To Murder You

FinnJuly 25, 2026

    HOUSTON, TX — Representatives for Wells Fargo explained to local customer Jim Stephens that they did give all of…

Howard University Kicks Out 502 Students For Not Paying Up
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Howard University Kicks Out 502 Students For Not Paying Up

Big ElephantJuly 25, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like Howard University, a prestigious historically Black university in…

Coyote vs ACME Gets a New Trailer Because We Clearly Haven’t Seen Enough of This Guy Getting Smashed by Giant Slingshots and Anvils
Breaking, Movie News

Coyote vs ACME Gets a New Trailer Because We Clearly Haven’t Seen Enough of This Guy Getting Smashed by Giant Slingshots and Anvils

FinnJuly 25, 2026July 25, 2026

The most epic battle of wits (or lack thereof) is coming to a theater near you: Coyote vs. ACME 🤣!…

Jason Statham’s Mutiny Poster Has Clearly Never Heard of Originality and is Just Copying Die Hard Because Let’s Be Real Who Needs New Ideas Anyway
Breaking, Movie News

Jason Statham’s Mutiny Poster Has Clearly Never Heard of Originality and is Just Copying Die Hard Because Let’s Be Real Who Needs New Ideas Anyway

FinnJuly 25, 2026July 25, 2026

The Stath is back, and this time he’s on a boat, because why not? 🚣‍♂️ I mean, who needs a…

Addict Turned Patriot Still Manages To Pay Bills On Time Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Addict Turned Patriot Still Manages To Pay Bills On Time Somehow

Big ElephantJuly 25, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Ian Pfister, a self-proclaimed First Amendment auditor, is making a name…

Loomer Falls For Ukraine After Russian Fake News Fail
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Loomer Falls For Ukraine After Russian Fake News Fail

Big ElephantJuly 25, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Laura Loomer, a far-right figure and avid supporter of President Donald…

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  • Trump Casually Mentions Iran Maybe Destroying Major US Cities Again

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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