12 Bible Characters Reveal Their New Year’s Resolutions
The start of the new year is traditionally a time when people make their resolutions to better themselves. While many…
Day: January 2, 2025
Man Injured Protecting Wife From Polar Bear
Read MoreThe OnionA man has sustained serious injuries after rescuing his wife who was ambushed by a polar bear in…
FBI Asks X Users To Please Stop Solving Crimes Before They Do
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a formal statement, the FBI has called on Internet sleuths, particularly X users, to please stop…
Wife Announces New Year Resolutions For Husband
RED BLUFF, CA — As people ring in the new year by taking on resolutions meant to improve their lives,…
Slovenia Joins Star Citizen?! 🇸🇮🚀 Gamers Stunned by $60K BRATislava DLC!
Star Citizen, the galaxy’s most expensive PowerPoint presentation masquerading as a video game, is at it again with the announcement…
Disney Announces Live-Action Remake Of Animated Remake Of Live-Action Remake Of Animated Remake Of Live-Action Remake
BURBANK, CA — The Walt Disney Company announced a bold new take on a classic remake of a classic film…
FBI Assures Nation It Will Put Its Most Diverse Agents On Terror Case
NEW ORLEANS, LA — In the wake of the deadly New Year’s terrorist attack on Bourbon Street, the Federal Bureau…
Tips For Picking Out Running Shoes
Read MoreThe OnionWith the start of a new year, many Americans will be engaging in new fitness routines, with jogging…
‘Cultivate A Growth Mindset’ And 40 Other Phrases That Give Sad Sacks Like You False Hope
Read MoreThe OnionThe post ‘Cultivate A Growth Mindset’ And 40 Other Phrases That Give Sad Sacks Like You False Hope…