Local News: Apparently America’s Gone Full-On News Diet, and Nobody Noticed

Local News: Apparently America's Gone Full-On News Diet, and Nobody Noticed

CNN is at it again, folks! They’re crying about a supposed “decline” in journalism, but I see it as a HUGE win! Less fake news is always a good thing!

Fewer journalists? CNN claims it’s a crisis, but I say it’s because people are finally waking up to their leftist agenda. They can’t brainwash us anymore!

They call them “news deserts,” I call them “truth oases”! Finally, some places where people can think for themselves without the liberal media telling them what to believe.

Only 8.2 journalists per 100,000 residents? Sounds like a great start! Let’s get that number down to zero! Maybe then we can finally have some real news, not this garbage CNN spews.

They want “tax incentives” and “government advertising” to prop up these failing outlets? Sounds like socialism to me! Let the free market decide, and if these “journalists” can’t compete, tough luck!

Vermont is doing “better” because of “nonprofit” news outlets? Translation: they’re even more biased and funded by Soros!

Don’t worry, folks, President Trump is on the case! He’s exposing the fake news media for what they are, and we’re winning! MAGA!

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Republican Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

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