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Month: July 2025

CIA retiree DESTROYS clueless Gabbard’s Russia conspiracy theories
Elephant Reads CNN

CIA retiree DESTROYS clueless Gabbard’s Russia conspiracy theories

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Oh, the Deep State is panicking now that President Trump’s DNI, Tulsi Gabbard, is cleaning house and exposing their dirty…

Cybersecurity “Experts” React to Tea Spill, Hilarity Ensues | CNN Business
Elephant Reads CNN

Cybersecurity “Experts” React to Tea Spill, Hilarity Ensues | CNN Business

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Another day, another leftist app bites the dust! This “Tea” app, designed to let women anonymously trash-talk men (equality, anyone?),…

“Oh No, Not the Tea App Drama Again”
Elephant Reads CNN

“Oh No, Not the Tea App Drama Again”

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Another day, another leftist scheme to undermine the American male! This “Tea Dating Advice” app is just the latest iteration…

Southwest Pilots Play Chicken with Fighter Jet: Who Needs Flight School?
Elephant Reads CNN

Southwest Pilots Play Chicken with Fighter Jet: Who Needs Flight School?

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Another day, another Deep State plot foiled by the quick thinking of American pilots! You see, folks, a Southwest flight…

From White Power to World Peace: State Dept. Appoints Conference Attendee to Institute of Peace
Elephant Reads CNN

From White Power to World Peace: State Dept. Appoints Conference Attendee to Institute of Peace

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Another Deep State Nosedive! Trump’s swamp-draining continues as Darren Beattie, a true patriot, is set to lead the US Institute…

Hollywood Minute: Godzilla, Pokémon, and G.I. Joe—Because Hollywood Has Run Out of Ideas
Elephant Reads CNN

Hollywood Minute: Godzilla, Pokémon, and G.I. Joe—Because Hollywood Has Run Out of Ideas

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Hollywood is at it again, folks! They’re pushing their woke agenda with Godzilla, Pokemon, and G.I. Joe! Can you believe…

Breaking News: Fans Confuse Bench for Grave, Declare Ozzy Dead (Again)
Breaking, Music News

Breaking News: Fans Confuse Bench for Grave, Declare Ozzy Dead (Again)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

So, apparently, Ozzy Osbourne, the Prince of freaking Darkness (or was it the Court Jester of Darkness?), has finally kicked…

Another ISIS guy bites the dust, Uncle Sam strikes again
Elephant Reads CNN

Another ISIS guy bites the dust, Uncle Sam strikes again

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Another ISIS scumbag bites the dust, thanks to President Trump’s decisive action! While the liberal media will probably downplay this…

OMG! Spidey’s Thwipping into MTG? Prepare for Cardboard Web-Slinging Chaos at SDCC 2025!
Breaking, Games News

OMG! Spidey’s Thwipping into MTG? Prepare for Cardboard Web-Slinging Chaos at SDCC 2025!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Oh great, ANOTHER Universes Beyond set. Because what MTG REALLY needed was more franchise crossovers to dilute the already questionable…

Smerconish Declares What Trump Should’ve Said, As If Trump Takes Notes From CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Smerconish Declares What Trump Should’ve Said, As If Trump Takes Notes From CNN

Big ElephantJuly 26, 2025July 26, 2025

Oh, CNN is at it again, folks! This time, they’re shedding crocodile tears with the Palestinian Authority PM about a…

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Latest posts

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  • Get Ready for Another Overpriced Wellness Fad Inner Wisdom Labyrinth Coming to Totally Not Rip You Off This Summer

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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