Ozzy’s Dead (Again)! Streams Go Brrr
According to The Hollywood Reporter, Oh, look! 🙄Turns out that the only way people remember who Ozzy Osbourne is (or…
Month: July 2025
ICE Detains Pastor’s Pal, Hilarity Ensues (Not Really) | CNN
Another sob story from CNN about an illegal alien! This “pastor” overstayed his visa! Cry me a river! He should…
DAUGHTRY’s Back With Another EP? Prepare for ‘Shock To The System (Part Two)’ and the Earth-Shattering Single ‘The Bottom’
Okay, folks, buckle up because your ears are about to be assaulted! 🎉 Multi-platinum rock band DAUGHTRY (yes, they’re still…
Hulk Hogan Dead At 71
Read MoreThe OnionHulk Hogan, who used his bombastic showmanship to transform professional wrestling and take the sport mainstream, died in…
Nashville’s Antique Overpriced Yard Sale
**OMG! The Nashville Vintage Market is BACK! 🙄 Prepare for overpriced socks and dusty vinyl!** 📅 August 9th, 12-6pm. 📍…
Nation’s Lesbians Announce Plan To Go To The Zoo Today
U.S. — The lesbians of the nation have announced that they are once again planning to go to the zoo…
‘Happy Gilmore 2’ on Netflix: Prepare for Peak Cinema (Or Not, LOL)
Oh, joy! 🙄 After a geological epoch of 30 years, during which the cinematic landscape evolved faster than a Charizard…
Ghislaine Maxwell’s Attorney Spills the Tea to CNN: A Real Legal Masterclass or Just More Fluff?
Oh, isn’t that just precious? Ghislaine “I Know Too Much” Maxwell, the gal pal of that sicko Epstein, spilling the…
Seeker-Sensitive Church Hires Sydney Sweeney For New Ad Campaign
NAPERVILLE, IL — A local seeker-sensitive church was attracting a lot of attention this week with an exciting new ad…
Game Over: Human Meme Hulk Hogan Loses His Final Boss Battle with Reality
At the ripe old age of 71, the squared circle in the sky has called home its most orange-tanned disciple…