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Month: July 2025

CNN Asks ‘Superman’ Cast Members What Brand of Coffee They Can’t Live Without
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks ‘Superman’ Cast Members What Brand of Coffee They Can’t Live Without

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Another woke Hollywood production brought to you by the fake news media! Of course, CNN is promoting this garbage. The…

AI-generated Fake News Frenzy: US Officials Edition
Elephant Reads CNN

AI-generated Fake News Frenzy: US Officials Edition

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

CNN is at it again, folks! They’re now claiming that Secretary of State Marco Rubio and White House Chief of…

Oh, Canada! Your Niceness Is SO Annoying It Crashed the Web
Elephant Reads CNN

Oh, Canada! Your Niceness Is SO Annoying It Crashed the Web

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Oh, Canada! Land of maple syrup, free healthcare (that isn’t really free), and now, nauseating levels of virtue signaling! This…

CNN Asks the Real Questions: Could Trump Even Handle NYC’s Pigeons, Let Alone Run It?
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks the Real Questions: Could Trump Even Handle NYC’s Pigeons, Let Alone Run It?

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Folks, can you believe the fake news CNN is at it again? They’re hyperventilating because our great President Trump suggested…

OMG! China’s at it again, stealing legal secrets from DC’s elite
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! China’s at it again, stealing legal secrets from DC’s elite

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Oh, CNN is reporting that Chinese hackers are at it again? Quelle surprise! Apparently, they broke into the email accounts…

Red Bull Home Ground crash lands at Fan Expo Toronto, brace for impact on August 23
Games News, Live

Red Bull Home Ground crash lands at Fan Expo Toronto, brace for impact on August 23

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Oh, boy, oh, boy! 🤪 Get ready, folks, because the Canadian Qualifier for Red Bull Home Ground, that totally-not-boring official…

ELO Cancels ‘Final’ Concert AGAIN, Guess Jeff Lynne Found Another Reason to Dodge Fans
Breaking

ELO Cancels ‘Final’ Concert AGAIN, Guess Jeff Lynne Found Another Reason to Dodge Fans

Chord F. DiscordJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Jeff Lynne’s ELO (a.k.a. the ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA, or as I like to call them, “Barely Functional Octogenarians”) has pulled…

Trump declares war on tacos and croissants
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump declares war on tacos and croissants

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

More Winning! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is slapping 30% tariffs on the EU and Mexico. It’s about time…

CNN: Trump’s Epic Fail Assassination Attempt Still Echoing Through the Ages
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Trump’s Epic Fail Assassination Attempt Still Echoing Through the Ages

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Another year, another foiled attempt by the Deep State to take down our glorious President Trump! Salena Zito’s new book…

Signed a Petition? Go to Jail! Lobby Group Declares War on Gamers
1.3 Million Gamers at Risk of Prison for Demanding Their Rights
Games News

Signed a Petition? Go to Jail! Lobby Group Declares War on Gamers

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

A new initiative called “Start Jailing Gamers” has sent shockwaves through the gaming community after being launched by the infamous…

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Latest posts

  • White House Helipad Gets Downgraded to Drone Landing Strip
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  • Springsteen’s Wife Patti Scialfa Beats Cancer After 8 Year Battle
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: DJT boasts of record polling numbers and vows Republican greatness
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President Donald J. Trump Bridge opens in Tennessee

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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