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Month: November 2025

BREAKING: Old Dude From Whitesnake Finally Realizes He’s Old, Quits
Breaking, Music News

BREAKING: Old Dude From Whitesnake Finally Realizes He’s Old, Quits

Chord F. DiscordNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

OMG! 😱 David Coverdale, the dude who basically invented hairspray and skintight jeans, has officially retired! 👴🎸 Say it ain’t…

Oklahoma Guv Pulls Epic Save on Death Row Dude Like a Boss
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Oklahoma Guv Pulls Epic Save on Death Row Dude Like a Boss

Big ElephantNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Another day, another Democrat soft on crime! Oklahoma’s Governor Stitt, probably listening to the radical left, just saved a cold-blooded…

Justice Gorsuch to Bless Young Minds with Declaration of Independence Bedtime Story
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Justice Gorsuch to Bless Young Minds with Declaration of Independence Bedtime Story

Big ElephantNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Another day, another Deep State plot revealed! Justice Gorsuch, a true patriot, is writing a children’s book about the Declaration…

Wildgate’s “Massive” Update: New Game Modes, a Character (Maybe), and More (Probably Not)
Breaking, Games News

Wildgate’s “Massive” Update: New Game Modes, a Character (Maybe), and More (Probably Not)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Okay, so Wildgate, the game that promised to be the next big thing but is probably just gonna be another…

OpenAI, Microsoft, and the Fuzz: AI Safety Task Force Assembled
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

OpenAI, Microsoft, and the Fuzz: AI Safety Task Force Assembled

Big ElephantNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Oh, the horror! Now the woke mob is coming for our AI! Can’t these liberals leave anything alone? It’s always…

Blu-Ray Review – Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale (Finally!)
Breaking, Movie News

Blu-Ray Review – Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale (Finally!)

FinnNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Ah, Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale. Because what the world REALLY needed was MORE Crawley family drama. Because apparently, we…

Dem Accuses Dem of Being a Royalist in Shocking Floor Drama
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Dem Accuses Dem of Being a Royalist in Shocking Floor Drama

Big ElephantNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Another day, another Democrat meltdown! Rep. Marie Gluesenkamp Perez, supposedly a “centrist” (read: slightly less radical socialist), is now attacking…

Scientists Confirm Aurora Borealis Will Be Visible On Google Images Tonight
The Onion

Scientists Confirm Aurora Borealis Will Be Visible On Google Images Tonight

FinnNovember 13, 2025

       BOULDER, CO—Stressing that it represented an ideal opportunity to see one of nature’s greatest wonders, scientists at the NOAA…

Farmers’ Almanac Ceases Publication
The Onion

Farmers’ Almanac Ceases Publication

FinnNovember 13, 2025

       The 208-year-old publication Farmers’ Almanac, not to be confused with the more famous Old Farmers’ Almanac, will cease publication…

Babylon Bee

Trump Replaces Pennies With Cool New POGs

FinnNovember 13, 2025

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — After 232 years of continuous production, the final U.S. penny was minted in Philadelphia on Wednesday.…

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