Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz: Back for More Bandages and Bad Decisions
OMG 😱! Are you serious?! Another Mummy movie? Starring BRENDAN FRASER 👴 and RACHEL WEISZ 👵?! It’s like Universal Pictures…
Day: November 4, 2025
UPS Plane Does a Funny Dive Near Louisville Airport, According to Some Guy | CNN
Another day, another disaster, folks! This time, a UPS plane conveniently crashes near Louisville. Coincidence? I think NOT! Probably carrying…
Trump’s Genius Plan: Big Pharma to the Rescue with $149 “Cure” for Your Supersized Self
Folks, your favorite President, Donald J. Trump, is about to make America great (and thin) again! He’s reportedly hammering out…
‘Surgery Was The Right Call,’ Says Doctor While Handing You A Bill For $450,000
   U.S. — You can rest assured that the decision you made was the correct one, as the doctor who…
Hot New Balatro Calendar Starring Ben Starr as Jimbo: Prepare to Have Your Mind Hilariously BLOWN!
Behold, mortals! After gracing our screens as the one and only Jimbo (yes, the mascot of Balatro, as if you…
Death Of Awkward Conversation Marked By Simultaneous Drink Sipping
   VISALIA, CA — According to sources, an awkward conversation spiraled toward its inevitable end Tuesday, marked by simultaneous drink…
Mamdani Announces Plan To Blame Racism After His Policies Fail
   NEW YORK, NY — As residents of the Big Apple made their way to the polls today, New York…
Godzilla RPG: Finally, a TTRPG Where You Can Just Stomp Everything
IDW Games, those masterminds behind such *totally* unforgettable classics like… uh… well, they’re releasing a Godzilla Tabletop Roleplaying Game! 🙄…
5 whole questions about the Michigan Terror Plot Arrests (as if anyone cares)
Another day, another foiled terrorist plot, and guess where? Michigan! You know, that state that’s been trying to sneakily turn…
Shein: Single-Handedly Destroying French Culture With Questionable Fashion Choices and Creepy Dolls
The French are at it again, folks! First, they whine about our glorious President Trump, and now they’re turning up…