Historic Wildfires Ravage Los Angeles
Read MoreThe OnionAt least five fires across the Los Angeles area, including one in Hollywood Hills, scorched more than 45…
Month: January 2025
Distressing Survey Finds Most U.S. Citizens Unable To Name All 340 Million Americans
Read MoreThe OnionWASHINGTON—Revealing a steep decline in the populace’s knowledge of its own country, a distressing survey commissioned Monday by…
🌌 Asteroid vs. Bieber: America’s Bold Plan to Stop His 2025 Music Comeback!
In a move that would make Hollywood disaster films look tame, a growing movement in the United States is petitioning…
Los Angeles Saved After Meghan Markle Arrives To Stand Around Wearing Baseball Cap
LOS ANGELES, CA — In what many are already calling a modern-day miracle, the city of Los Angeles was saved…
Kamala Harris Stymied As Argument With Talking Cactus Toy Enters Third Hour
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Vice President Kamala Harris continued to get the worst of the exchanges as a heated argument with…
Delta Smelt Fish Association Reiterates Support For Gavin Newsom
SACRAMENTO, CA — With Governor Gavin Newsom facing withering criticism over his preparations for wildfires, the Delta Smelt Fish Association…
Shameful: Activist Liberal Judge Releases Another Felon Onto Streets Of New York City
MANHATTAN, NY — In another disgusting display of judicial activism, progressive judge Juan Merchan released a man convicted of 34…
9 New Attractions Ken Ham Plans To Add To The Ark Encounter
The Ark Encounter continues to be a hot spot for tourists across the country, but creator Ken Ham is reportedly…
A.I. To Be Trained On Reddit To Make Sure It Never Becomes Too Intelligent
U.S. — To counteract concerns that Artificial Intelligence is growing too rapidly and will soon become self-aware and destroy humanity,…
Cruel: Trump Sentenced To Drink Only Diet Pepsi
NEW YORK, NY — In a controversial conclusion to the “hush money” trial against him, President-elect Donald Trump was forced…