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Oblivion Remaster: ‘Body Type’ vs ‘Gender’ โ€“ Who Won This Clown Show? ๐Ÿคก๐ŸŽ‰

Oblivion Remastered
Chinese Gamers Wreck NexusMods! Premium Subs Plummet! ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ’ธ

Hey there, gamers and absurdity enthusiasts, Jackal.Today is here to dive into a wild story about the biggest modding platform NexusMods, the remaster of the iconic game The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion Remastered, the controversial “Male/Female” gender choice versus the bizarre “Body Type 1/Body Type 2” nonsense, and a massive player revolt with premium subscription cancellations as their weapon of choice!

Add to that banned modders, pissed-off Chinese gamers, and NexusModsโ€™ leadership, which seems stuck in some alternate reality where Woke agendas rule supreme. Ready to laugh at this clown show? Then grab your keyboards, โ€˜cause weโ€™re about to tear this drama apart with memes and snark! ๐Ÿคก๐Ÿ”ฅ

Letโ€™s start with how this mess kicked off. Bethesda, in their infinite โ€œwisdom,โ€ decided that in the Oblivion Remaster, the classic “Male/Female” gender selection was just too outdated and, apparently, not โ€œinclusiveโ€ enough. So instead, they shoved some weird crap called “Body Type 1” and “Body Type 2” down our throats. Seriously? Body Type? Are we in a mannequin-building simulator now? โ€œPick your vibe, player: Body Type 1 with abs or Body Type 2 withโ€ฆ well, figure it out yourself.โ€ Gamers who remember 2006 and the original Oblivion nearly choked on this โ€œinnovativeโ€ design. Back then, it was simple: pick a gender, slap on a beard or some thick eyebrows, and go slay enemies in Tamriel. Now weโ€™ve got โ€œbody types,โ€ like weโ€™re ordering a pizza with different toppings. Naturally, the community flipped out and started hunting for mods to fix this nonsense. Enter the hero of the hour โ€“ the Body Type Selector mod, which brought back the good olโ€™ “Male/Female” options. And guess what happened next? Yup, NexusMods, the grand protector of โ€œinclusivity,โ€ decided this mod was too bold, yanked it off the site, and banned the creator. Of course, they couldnโ€™t let anyone mess with the holy DEI agenda! Heaven forbid some โ€œsnowflakeโ€ gets offended over their โ€œbody typeโ€ being labeled wrong. Sorry, but this isnโ€™t modding anymore โ€“ itโ€™s straight-up comedy! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ› ๏ธ

๐ŸŽฐ HOW FAKE IS THIS NEWS?
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SPIN THE FAKE โ†’

Gaming Mod News: NexusMods Brings Back “Male/Female” Mod for Oblivion Remaster After Mass Premium Subscription Cancellations by Outraged Players! ๐ŸŽฎ

Think thatโ€™s the end of the story? Nope, it gets even funnier! Chinese gamers, who clearly didnโ€™t vibe with “Body Type 1/Body Type 2” either, created their own localization to bring back the normal gender selection. And what did NexusMods do? You guessed it โ€“ they deleted that too and banned the Chinese modder. Bravo, folks, just bravo! Offending an entire nation to defend your weird principles โ€“ thatโ€™s some next-level boss fight stuff right there. But Chinese players arenโ€™t the type to take this lying down. Rumor has it they staged a full-on digital uprising, mass-canceling their premium subscriptions on NexusMods. And lo and behold, once the siteโ€™s admins felt the heat from their wallets taking a hit, they hurriedly brought back the Body Type Selector mod to the top 3 most popular mods for Oblivion Remastered. Though, they did disable comments under the mod โ€“ probably โ€˜cause the roasting down there was too hot for any mod team to handle. Here at Jackal.Today, weโ€™re cracking up: can someone make a mod to restore a few brain cells to NexusModsโ€™ leadership? โ€˜Cause right now, their decisions look like theyโ€™re playing a totally different game called โ€œHow to Lose Every Userโ€™s Trust in 24 Hours.โ€ ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ˜ก

So, whatโ€™s next? Will NexusMods keep up their dumb censorship experiments, or will they finally get that gamers arenโ€™t a bunch of sheep whoโ€™ll swallow any garbage thrown at them? We at Jackal.Today are holding out hope that by 2025, as some insiders predict, all this Woke and DEI nonsense gets tossed into the trash bin of history, and the gaming industry gets back to what weโ€™re all here for โ€“ dope games, epic adventures, and freedom of choice, not forcing down โ€œcorrectโ€ terms from some corporate handbook. Real talk, if Bethesda and NexusMods think we gamers are just gonna nod along to their โ€œbody types,โ€ they clearly donโ€™t know who theyโ€™re messing with. Weโ€™re the lunatics who beat Oblivion on the hardest difficulty, fought dragons in Skyrim with nothing but a rusty spoon, and survived Dark Souls without a single checkpoint. So, NexusMods folks, donโ€™t test us, or weโ€™ll start a boycott so fierce your servers will crash under the weight of angry memes and rants screaming โ€œgive us back our gender options!โ€ For now, weโ€™re waiting on a mod to fast-forward your clocks to 2025, where, as weโ€™ve been told, the entertainment industry finally starts ditching all this ideological clutter. ๐ŸŽฎโณ

Speaking of whoโ€™s getting the short end of the stick here, letโ€™s have a laugh at ourselves โ€“ the regular gamers. We donโ€™t ask for much: just give us our games the way they were, or at least let us mod them however we want. But nooo, thereโ€™s always gotta be some โ€œsocial justice warriorsโ€ deciding that the word โ€œgenderโ€ is too offensive and needs to be swapped for something more โ€œneutral.โ€ Fine, letโ€™s start calling everyone โ€œBody Type 1โ€ and โ€œBody Type 2โ€ in real life then. Imagine walking down the street and someone yells, โ€œHey, Body Type 1, got the time?โ€ Pure romance, fantasy-level stuff! And these clowns at NexusMods, banning everyone left and right, only to bring mods back when the heatโ€™s on โ€“ arenโ€™t they just hilarious? Letโ€™s all have a good chuckle at these โ€œguardians of inclusivityโ€ who donโ€™t seem to know what they even want. Big props to the Chinese gamers, though โ€“ now thatโ€™s a boycott with some fire! Mass-canceling subscriptions like that isnโ€™t just posting memes on Twitter; itโ€™s a legit digital revolution. And to any โ€œsnowflakesโ€ reading this and already drafting angry emails to our editor, Iโ€™ve got one thing to say: chill, itโ€™s just humor. If the word โ€œgenderโ€ triggers you, maybe gaming ainโ€™t your thing โ€“ try something safer, like knitting. ๐Ÿงถ๐Ÿ˜œ

Lastly, letโ€™s speculate on the future. If NexusMods keeps this up, their platformโ€™s gonna turn into some kind of ghetto for โ€œapprovedโ€ mods, where you canโ€™t even tweak a pixel without clearance from a DEI committee. Meanwhile, us gamers will have to go underground, trading mods on the dark web and whispering on forums about โ€œforbiddenโ€ files that bring normalcy back to games. Or maybe Bethesda will come to their senses and release a patch to restore gender options? Though, honestly, Iโ€™m not holding my breath โ€“ these guys seem so deep in their โ€œprogressiveโ€ rabbit hole that itโ€™s easier to wait for Sheogorathโ€™s second coming than for them to snap out of it. For now, we at Jackal.Today will keep tracking this wild saga and updating you on all the ridiculousness unfolding in the modding and gaming world. Stick with us, subscribe for more, and donโ€™t forget to share this article with your buddies โ€“ let them laugh at what the fight for โ€œinclusivityโ€ in gaming has turned into! And if youโ€™ve got your own stories about absurd dev or modder decisions, drop โ€˜em in the comments โ€“ weโ€™ll gladly dissect and roast them with you! ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ“ข

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Pixel P

Pixel P. Snarkbyte, widely regarded as the โ€œShakespeare of Sh*tposts,โ€ is a video game expert with a unique knack for turning pixels into punchlines.

Born in the small town of Respawn, Pennsylvania, Pixel grew up mashing buttons on an ancient NES controller, firmly believing that โ€œblowing into the cartridgeโ€ was a sacred ritual passed down through generations.

Pixel P. Snarkbyte: proving that life, much like a buggy open-world game, is better with a little lag-induced chaos.

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