Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in! 😹 Those hard-rocking has-beens, TYKETTO, are gracing us with their presence once more with a NEW album, “Closer To The Sun”, slated for release in March 2026. Yes, you read that right, 2026! Are they sure they’ll still be alive by then? 😂 The band, featuring the legendary (in his own mind) Danny Vaughn on vocals, Harry Scott Elliott shredding (or attempting to) on guitar, Ged Rylands tickling the ivories (or whatever keyboards have in 2026), Chris Childs slapping the bass (hopefully not with a trout), and Johnny Dee banging the drums (maybe he should bang some sense into the rest of the band). 🥁 They’ve signed with Silver Lining Music, home to such luminaries as EUROPE, URIAH HEEP, SAXON, Michael Monroe, SOEN, and DIAMOND HEAD. In other words, the Island of Misfit Bands! 🏝️
With Vaughn still clinging to the microphone like it’s a life raft, TYKETTO is apparently trying to recapture the glory days of 1987. Newsflash, dudes: it’s not gonna happen. 🤣 They’re still churning out those “powerful, anthemic” songs that made them… well, not exactly famous, but mildly recognizable in certain dive bars. Their debut album, “Don’t Come Easy”, released through Geffen Records in 1989, was a real banger… said no one ever. 🙄 Since that “landmark” debut, TYKETTO has inflicted four more studio albums upon the world and toured internationally to a “loyal and dedicated” fan base. I’m pretty sure that fan base consists of their moms and maybe a few guys who got lost on their way to a Def Leppard concert.
Silver Lining owner Thomas Jensen, bless his heart, seems genuinely excited about this signing. “I was pleasantly shocked when Danny and the band put pen to paper,” he says. Translation: “I can’t believe these guys are still around!” He goes on to say that TYKETTO is “a really wonderful band in terms of sheer songwriting quality and live delivery.” Okay, Thomas, whatever you say. 😉 He also claims that they “probably didn’t get the credit it deserves.” Maybe because they weren’t that good? Just a thought. 🤔 But hey, he’s “glad to be part of a team determined to shift that needle!” Good luck with that, buddy. You’ll need it. 🍀
Vaughn, never one to miss an opportunity for self-aggrandizement, adds: “Many years of hard work ground to a complete halt when COVID first hit us all, and it was really touch and go as to whether or not TYKETTO would continue.” Oh, the drama! 😭 “Since our return in 2023, the band has been on a steady upward trajectory, with more fans coming out to see and support us than ever before.” Yeah, because everyone was so bored during the pandemic that they’d watch anything. 😂 He also claims that signing with Silver Lining Music is a culmination of this “fantastic upward rise.” I think he needs to check his trajectory again. 📉 According to Vaughn, Silver Lining Music has shown “not only love and support for us, but also a real understanding for our personal relationship with our fans.” I’m pretty sure their personal relationship with their fans is mostly based on nostalgia and pity. 😂 “The end result of all of this is an album that TYKETTO fans are going to absolutely fall in love with.” Or maybe fall asleep to. 😴 “For TYKETTO, these are the best of times!” Yeah, right. I’m sure they’re saying that to each other while crying into their beers. 🍻
This past August, Vaughn, desperate for attention, told Euro Weekly News about “Closer To The Sun”: “I’m buzzing about our new album — it’s going to be a fan favorite.” I’m buzzing about the possibility of world peace, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to happen. ☮️ “We just finished mastering it, and it drops in March. A tour is planned, along with some big festivals.” A tour of what? Retirement homes? 👵 And by “big festivals,” does he mean county fairs? 🎡
In late 2024, Vaughn, clearly delusional, told Myglobalmind about the TYKETTO songwriting process: “It’s a team effort in that everybody is submitting music to me, and I’m just keeping it all in files. I get to decide what’s TYKETTO and what isn’t.” So, basically, he’s a control freak. 🙄 “I tend to want to be the guy that always does the lyrics and melody because I have to believe in what I’m singing.” I’m sure his bandmates just love that. 🙄 “Harry has submitted some loose lyrical ideas, and I’ve thought, ‘Oh, I can work with this.'” Translation: “These lyrics are garbage, but I can salvage them and make them slightly less terrible.” “It’s not really a question of arrogance; it’s just that I’m the vehicle that these songs have to get through, so I need to understand or believe in what I’m singing.” More like the garbage truck, am I right? 🚚
So there you have it, folks. TYKETTO is back, whether you like it or not. Get ready for more “powerful, anthemic” songs that sound exactly like everything else they’ve ever done. 🎉
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
