ATTENTION! Trump Loyalist Strikes Again: Key US Attorney’s Office Gets a MAGA Makeover!
Another Deep State Swamp Creature Bites the Dust! Maggie Cleary, a card-carrying member of the anti-Trump cabal embedded in the…
Month: October 2025
Impressionable Teen Falls In With Wrong Socioeconomic Class
Read MoreThe OnionLARCHMONT, NY—Noting the 16-year-old had too big of an inheritance ahead of him to throw it all away,…
Man Buys New TV So He Can Watch NFL Refs Blow Calls In Stunning 4K Resolution
NEW BRAUNFELS, TX — One superfan’s dream of seeing his team play in high definition came true this weekend, as…
OpenAI Sucks Up Enough Juice to Power a Small Planet (Thanks, Sora 2 & ChatGPT)
Oh, the horror! OpenAI, fresh off its leftist indoctrination programs (err, I mean, “AI”), is now partnering with Broadcom to…
Ian Watkins’s Accused Killers Finally Unmasked; Ex Spills the Beans Post-Mortem
OMG! 😱 Can you believe it?! 🤪 The infamous LOSTPROPHETS dude, Ian Watkins, finally bit the dust! 💀 Seems like…
Oh, No! Not Canada Boycotting America Again: Who Will Buy Our Maple Syrup Now
Oh, the horror! It seems our polite neighbors to the north are throwing a hissy fit because President Trump dared…
Jamie Dimon Pledges a Paltry $10B to Save America (Finally!)
JPMorgan Chase, bowing to the brilliance of President Trump, is FINALLY investing in America! $10 billion to secure our supply…
Jeff Becerra Says POSSESSED’s New Album Will Be ‘Different’ – Translation: ‘We’re Screwed’
In a riveting exposé with Australia’s Devil’s Horns Zine, POSSESSED frontman Jeff Becerra, who, let’s be honest, probably spends more…
AC/DC’s Ex-Vocalist, Not Brian Johnson, Resurrects Obscure Pre-AC/DC Band RABBIT Because Why Not
Behold! 🤡 The original, the one, the only… DAVE EVANS is back! 🎉 To commemorate a half-century of… well, something…
Edgar Wright’s “The Running Man” Trailer: Prepare to Have Your Expectations Subverted (Maybe)
Edgar Wright, the guy who peaked with “Shaun of the Dead” 🧟♂️ (let’s be real, “Baby Driver” was just okay…