Oh, SWEET ZOMBIE JESUS! 🧟♂️ Another zombie flick? Because the world CLEARLY needed more of those! 🙄 Prepare yourselves for “We Bury The Dead,” a cinematic masterpiece (or maybe just a cinematic experience, let’s be real) where the dead rise, but like, in a *super* original way. After a “catastrophic military disaster” – because apparently, our military is only good at creating zombies – the dead decide to ditch the whole “resting in peace” thing and go full-on “hunter-gatherer” on the living. 🏃♀️🏃♂️ But don’t worry, the military, in their infinite wisdom (or maybe just infinite denial), assures us they’re “harmless and slow-moving.” Yeah, right. Tell that to the grieving families who are probably just THRILLED at the prospect of Great-Grandma Ethel gnawing on their brains. 🧠
So, we’ve got Ava (aka Daisy Ridley, slumming it after Star Wars, bless her heart 🙏), who decides to waltz into a “quarantine zone” (because those are TOTALLY safe, right?) in search of her missing hubby. What she finds is, SURPRISE, SURPRISE, the undead are evolving faster than a Pokémon on steroids. 💪 They’re getting more violent, more relentless, and more dangerous, which begs the question: what were they doing before? Playing mahjong? 🤔
And if you need more convincing, there’s a trailer! Brace yourself for jump scares, questionable CGI, and enough zombie groaning to make your ears bleed. 👂🩸 It’s written and directed by Zak Hilditch, who, let’s hope, has a REALLY good explanation for why he decided to add to the already overflowing zombie genre. Starring alongside Daisy “I Need a New Agent” Ridley are Brenton Thwaites, Mark Coles Smith, and Matt Whelan, who are probably wondering what they did in a past life to deserve this. 🤷♂️
Vertical, bless their optimistic hearts, will be unleashing this undead extravaganza in US cinemas on January 2nd, 2026. So mark your calendars, folks! 🗓️ Get ready to experience… something. Maybe boredom. Maybe regret. But definitely zombies. 🧟♀️🧟♂️ Don’t forget your popcorn 🍿…and maybe a weapon. Just in case. 😉
Oh, and let’s not forget the poster! 🖼️ It’s got Daisy Ridley looking all angsty and determined, surrounded by… you guessed it, ZOMBIES! 🧟♂️🧟♀️ It’s a real work of art, if by “art” you mean “generic zombie movie poster #372.” 🎨 Bravo! 👏
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
