Liberal Hollywood elites thinks being ‘horny’ is something to brag about
Oh boy, are the fake news media and their liberal friends in a tizzy. It seems they’re still whining about…
Month: April 2026
Sabrina Carpenter Turns Body Fully Inside Out In Horrific New ‘Juno’ Position
INDIO, CA—Generating mixed reactions from festivalgoers during her headline performance at Coachella, pop star Sabrina Carpenter reportedly turned her…
Daredevil Actor Charlie Cox Finally Figures Out How To Use a Controller and Plays Clair Obscur Expedition 33 Gets Absolutely Destroyed
Wow, what a total “legend” 🤣, Charlie Cox, the amazing actor who voices Gustave in Clair Obscur: Expedition 33, has…
Oh Joy Another Beloved Childhood Classic Is About to Be Ruined by a Soulless Live-Action Remake of FernGully Because What the World Really Needed Was a Reboot of a Movie About a Fairy and a Human Who Fall in Love in the Rainforest
Breaking news: The Amazon rainforest might not be the last one after all, because Amazon MGM is remaking FernGully: The…
Report: Heaven Offers Special Perks For People Who Dress Up Nice For Church
HEAVEN — According to angelic sources, Heaven offers special perks for people who dress up nice for church. HEAVEN…
Oil Prices Plummet In Big Fuck-You To Americans Who Got Gas Yesterday
WASHINGTON—In what is being characterized as a massive middle finger to millions of furious motorists, oil prices plummeted Friday,…
Newsom Reinstates Death Penalty For Anyone Caught Investigating Fraud
SACRAMENTO, CA — California Governor Gavin Newsom announced on Friday that he would be signing a law reinstating the…
Tips For Getting Better Haircuts
Getting a haircut you truly love can be a challenge. The Onion shares tips for getting better haircuts. Be…
$400M Ticketmaster Settlement Reduced To Just $11.50 After Fees
NEW YORK, NY — A New York federal court found Ticketmaster guilty of operating as a monopoly following its…
Gen Zer Puts On Her Nice Pajamas For Job Interview
FEDERAL WAY, WA — Local Gen Zer Krista Evans reportedly selected her fanciest pajamas for a recent job interview…