OMG, mark your calendars, fellow gamers! 🗓️ The Gayming Awards 2025, the *only* LGBTQ+ video game award show (because apparently, straight people can’t appreciate pixels? 🤔), is descending upon us on July 8th. Get ready for a glitter explosion 💥 and enough rainbows 🌈 to make a unicorn jealous! 🦄
The annual Gayming Awards, because one year of fabulousness just isn’t enough, is back to shove diversity down our throats! They’ve bravely announced the hosts, who are totally not hand-picked to check off inclusivity boxes. Nope, not at all. This year, we have DEERE, Milady Confetti (because every awards show needs a confetti cannon 🎊), and the legendary Morgan McMichaels from *RuPaul’s Drag Race* (because gaming and drag are totally the same thing, right? 🤪). Oh, and let’s not forget game designer Rebecca Heineman, who’s getting the “Gayming Icon Award” – because apparently, being good at coding isn’t enough; you also need a label. 🏷️
Speaking of hosts, DEERE is back with their “fearless charisma” (whatever that means) and gaming “savvy” (probably just knows how to rage-quit like the rest of us). Milady Confetti, the inclusivity warrior, will be there to make sure everyone feels “safe” and “validated” (eye roll emoji). And Morgan McMichaels? Well, they’re just there to look pretty and remind us that this is a *gay* event. 💅
But wait, there’s more! Rebecca Heineman, the Gayming Icon, apparently won a *Space Invaders* tournament in 1980. Groundbreaking! 🤯 She also “helped port” some games. Riveting stuff. I’m sure the kids these days are super impressed. 🙄 There’s even a trailer! Get hyped for awkward cuts, forced smiles, and the word “gayming” repeated approximately 7,000 times. 🤮
And because no awards show is complete without manufactured drama, they’re also celebrating the “LGBTQ+ Streamer Rising Star Class of 2025.” Because apparently, streaming while queer is a talent now? These lucky souls will get a “major prize package” from Elgato (aka, free stuff to shill on their channels) and other “prizes” (probably just exposure, which is totally worth, like, zero dollars). 💸
Robin Gray, the mastermind behind this whole shebang, says this year’s Gayming Awards will be the “biggest one yet!” Translation: more sponsors, more virtue signaling, and more opportunities to pat themselves on the back for being so “inclusive.” He also mentions an “iconic theme song” from Bentley. I’m sure it’ll be stuck in my head for weeks. 🎶 (Not in a good way).
So, tune in on July 8th, exclusively on WOW Presents Plus (because who needs mainstream platforms, am I right?). Prepare for a night of cringe-worthy moments, forced diversity, and enough glitter to blind a small horse. 🐴 You’ve been warned! ⚠️
Pixel P. Snarkbyte, widely regarded as the “Shakespeare of Sh*tposts,” is a video game expert with a unique knack for turning pixels into punchlines.
Born in the small town of Respawn, Pennsylvania, Pixel grew up mashing buttons on an ancient NES controller, firmly believing that “blowing into the cartridge” was a sacred ritual passed down through generations.
Pixel P. Snarkbyte: proving that life, much like a buggy open-world game, is better with a little lag-induced chaos.
