Roger Goodell Brushes Off Concerns About Biased Officiating
NEW ORLEANS, LA — As festivities ramped up in preparation for Super Bowl LIX this Sunday, National Football League Commissioner…
Month: February 2025
New White Noise Machine Helps Men Sleep By Playing Soothing Sounds Of An M-1 Garand
U.S. — Thousands of men across the United States are reporting better sleep after trying a new white noise machine…
🎸🦇 Animal Rights Activists Rage as Ozzy Osbourne Plans to Devour Bats On Stage! 🔥🐾
BIRMINGHAM, UK — A legendary concert or an absolute madhouse? The original lineup of Black Sabbath — Ozzy Osbourne, Tony…
Study Finds Human Brain Contains Entire Spoon’s Worth Of Nanoplastics
Read MoreThe OnionAccording to a new study, cognitively normal human brain samples collected at autopsy in early 2024 contained more…
Sex Ed Teacher Demonstrates How To Drive Truck Into Abortion Clinic
Read MoreThe OnionCLEARWATER, FL—Urging the middle school class to pay attention while he described the intimate process of revving the…
Democrats Warn Trump’s Unelected Shadow Government Is Dismantling Their Unelected Shadow Government
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Alarm bells are sounding across the United States government, where Democrats are warning that President Trump’s unelected…
Trump Unveils Exciting, Never-Before-Tried Strategy Of Having America Take Over Country In The Middle East
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump has announced that America will try a brand new, never-before-tried strategy of taking over a…
Trump Says Americans Could Feel ‘Some Pain’ From Tariffs
Read MoreThe OnionPresident Donald Trump said that Americans could feel “some pain” from the emerging trade war triggered by his…
The Biden Administration: Where Are They Now?
Many famous people drastically change their lives or careers once they leave the limelight and the former Biden administration is…
To Save Time, Men’s Bible Study Just Gonna Assume Everyone’s Prayer Request Is For Struggling With Porn
LEXINGTON, KY — An innovative change brought new life to the standard small group concept last week, as the members…