OMG! 😱 Scopely, bless their greedy little hearts, has announced that *Pokémon GO* Trainers – yes, the same ones still playing in 2025 – will soon be able to throw their hard-earned (or more likely, parent’s) cash at Shadow Raids and Max Battles using Remote Raid Passes! Because apparently, walking outside is *so* last decade. Prepare for more microtransactions, kids! 💸
So, listen up, fellow *Pokémon GO* addicts… I mean, *enthusiasts*! As you all desperately try to catch that elusive Shiny Bidoof for the 743rd time, Scopely’s decided to grace us with more ways to empty our wallets. Shadow Raids and Max Battle events are coming in May 2025! 🎉 (Yeah, I know, it’s still a year away. Gives you plenty of time to sell your kidneys for more raid passes). The kicker? They’re letting us use Remote Raid Passes for this now! Because why actually go outside and interact with other humans when you can just sit on your couch and swipe your credit card? 🤷♀️ And get this: both the Remote Raid and Max Particles limits are being “increased.” Because, you know, they’re *so* generous.🙄
For those of you living under a rock (or maybe just haven’t wasted your life savings on this game yet), Remote Raid Passes are those magical items that allow you to participate in raids from the comfort of your own home. You know, the same home you haven’t left since 2016. You can buy them in the Shop (for an arm and a leg, of course) or, if you’re lucky, snag them as “special event rewards” (which are usually just a ploy to get you to play more). Up to five of you can join a raid remotely, but keep in mind, your attack power is nerfed compared to those who actually bothered to show up in person. Because, you know, life isn’t fair. 😜
But wait, there’s more! Starting May 13th with the “Crown Clash: Taken Over” event (sounds… original?), you can use those precious Remote Raid Passes in Shadow Raids! Team Rocket’s apparently taken over Dialga and some other poor, unsuspecting Pokémon (probably because they couldn’t afford the raid passes either). It’s up to you, the valiant Trainer, to save them! By tapping your phone repeatedly and giving Scopely more money, obviously. 💰 And then, on May 19th, get ready for “Gigantamax Machamp Max Battle Day!” Accessible via Max Particles (whatever those are) AND Remote Raid Passes! This is the future of gaming, people! Stay inside and tap your screen! Those who attend in person get an extra Premier Ball and XP.
And now, the best part: LIMIT INCREASES! 🥳 The Remote Raid limit is going from five to ten! (And maybe even twenty during special events! Like Community Day Classic! Where you can catch even MORE Bidoof!). And the Max Particles limit is going from 1,000 to 1,500! Because, you know, they *really* want you to upgrade those Pokémon Max Moves. Whatever those are. I’m sure they’re important. Probably. 🙄
So, there you have it, folks. More ways to spend your money, more reasons to stay inside, and more Bidoof than you can shake a stick at. Get ready to take on Shadow Raids and Max Battles from… well, wherever your couch is! For more details, check out the *Pokémon GO* blog! (Warning: may contain excessive amounts of corporate jargon and marketing buzzwords). Happy raiding! (Or, you know, not. I’m not your mom). ✌️
Pixel P. Snarkbyte, widely regarded as the “Shakespeare of Sh*tposts,” is a video game expert with a unique knack for turning pixels into punchlines.
Born in the small town of Respawn, Pennsylvania, Pixel grew up mashing buttons on an ancient NES controller, firmly believing that “blowing into the cartridge” was a sacred ritual passed down through generations.
Pixel P. Snarkbyte: proving that life, much like a buggy open-world game, is better with a little lag-induced chaos.
