Okay, so some “critics” are slobbering all over ‘Murderbot’ and giving it a “respectable” 7.5/10. 🙄 As if that means anything in the grand scheme of things. I mean, who even *are* these people? Probably paid shills from Apple, desperately trying to justify their overpriced streaming service. Seriously, who needs another streaming service when you can just pirate everything? 🏴☠️
So, ‘Murderbot’ is apparently dropping on Apple TV+ on May 16th, because who wouldn’t want to spend their precious time watching something on *that* platform? 🙄 Alexander Skarsgård, bless his heart, is playing a “socially awkward” cyborg. Oh, the originality! 😴 It’s like they took every sci-fi trope, threw it in a blender, and hoped something vaguely watchable would come out. The premise? Murderbot just wants to binge-watch “awful TV shows” but is stuck protecting a bunch of annoying humans. I bet those are the “critics” mentioned before. Groundbreaking, I know. 🙄
Weitz Bros, who are, like, totally known for their edgy, groundbreaking work (insert sarcastic eye roll here), are behind this. 🙄 Noma Dumezweni is also in it, along with a bunch of other people I’ve never heard of, probably because they’re all hiding from the fact that they’re in this dumpster fire. 🔥
Apparently, it’s based on some novella. Because that’s always a recipe for success. 🙄 Let’s take a book that people may or may not have read and turn it into a watered-down, corporate-approved streaming series. What could possibly go wrong? 🤷♀️
Unlike those “serious” shows like ‘Foundation’ and ‘Silo’ (which are totally not boring, promise! 🤥), ‘Murderbot’ is trying to be “light.” You know, like Douglas Adams, but probably without the actual wit or intelligence. So, more like a wet fart in space. 💨
The Weitz brothers are apparently “in overall charge,” which is probably why it’s going to be so… “special.” They’ve “found a rich vein of humor,” which I’m sure translates to endless sarcasm and Sheldon Cooper-esque awkwardness. 🤣 Because that’s what we all want to see: another socially inept character we can feel superior to. 🙄
The plot, according to the article, is “slim.” No kidding! It’s about a droid who broke its programming and now has to deal with humans. We’ve never seen *that* before! 🙄 It’s a “character study,” because apparently, the writers couldn’t come up with an actual story. And conspiracy tropes? Political commentary? Oh, please. 🙄
Apparently, the scripts are full of opportunities for Murderbot to “bemoan his existence.” So, basically, it’s going to be a whiny robot for 30 minutes an episode. Sign me up! NOT. 🙅♀️ And if you’ve actually read the books, you’re probably going to hate this adaptation. But hey, at least they got the character’s name right! 🎉
Visually, it’s “decent,” which is code for “boring.” They had a “decent budget,” but it looks like they spent it all on Alexander Skarsgård’s paycheck. The rest of the show looks like it was filmed in a quarry, just like old ‘Doctor Who’ episodes. 🤣 At least those episodes were entertaining in a “so bad it’s good” way. This just sounds bad.
The article then complains that it might have been a movie that got split into episodes. Well, duh! That’s how they squeeze every last drop of profit out of these things. 💰
Skarsgård is the “MVP,” apparently. I’m sure he’s thrilled to be playing a robot who hates eye contact. Maybe he’s just channeling his inner celebrity. 🤔 David Dastmalchian and Noma Dumezweni are also in it, and they’re apparently “good.” But let’s be real, they’re probably just trying to pay their rent. 💸
And of course, there are cameos from John Cho, Clark Gregg, and Jack McBrayer. Because nothing says “originality” like throwing in a bunch of familiar faces. 🙄
‘Murderbot’ apparently “finds its own gear.” But that gear is probably “reverse.” 🔄 And the “amused irony” of a show about gadgets being produced by Apple is just… *chef’s kiss*. 🤌
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
