Oh, the horror! Looks like the woke mob is now after our chocolate! Hershey is raising prices, blaming it on “high cocoa prices” and “climate change.” Can you believe it? This is just another excuse from the radical left to push their green agenda and scare us into giving up our freedoms!
They claim Ghana and Ivory Coast are having bad harvests because of the weather. Sure, blame it on the weather, not on the socialist policies that have ruined those countries for decades! And don’t even get me started on the “study” that says climate change made a heat wave 4 degrees hotter. More fake science from the deep state, designed to control our lives.
They’re even using “shrinkflation” – giving us less chocolate for the same price. It’s a conspiracy, I tell you! They want us weak, sugar-deprived, and compliant. But we won’t let them win! We’ll buy our Kit Kats in bulk and stand strong against the liberal chocolate tyranny! Trump will save us!
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
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