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Month: November 2025

Zohran Mamdani Horrified To Discover He Now Has A Job
Babylon Bee

Zohran Mamdani Horrified To Discover He Now Has A Job

FinnNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

    NEW YORK, NY — In the wake of his overwhelming election win that signalled a dramatic political shift in…

Five Nights at Freddy’s 2 Drops a Trailer So Bad It’s Actually Hilarious
They’re not just at Freddy’s anymore
Breaking, Movie News

Five Nights at Freddy’s 2 Drops a Trailer So Bad It’s Actually Hilarious

FinnNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Okay, hold on to your hats, folks, because Blumhouse, those masterminds behind such cinematic triumphs as… well, some horror movies,…

Skindred Announces New Album Titled ‘You Got This’ Because Apparently We Didn’t Know, Also Shares Title Track, How Generous
Breaking, Music News

Skindred Announces New Album Titled ‘You Got This’ Because Apparently We Didn’t Know, Also Shares Title Track, How Generous

Chord F. DiscordNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Welsh “ragga metal” (🙄) legends SKINDRED, still clinging to relevance, have unleashed their new single, “You Got This” – a…

PlayStation Portal Gets Update: Now Slightly Less Useless
Breaking, Games News

PlayStation Portal Gets Update: Now Slightly Less Useless

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Oh boy, buckle up, buttercups! 🤩 Starting November 5th, the highly anticipated (by like, five people) PlayStation Portal is getting…

One blurry pic: Solved the UPS Kentucky plane crash mystery
Elephant Reads CNN

One blurry pic: Solved the UPS Kentucky plane crash mystery

Big ElephantNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Another day, another Deep State conspiracy! CNN, still sniffing around for ways to blame President Trump for something, is now…

Static & Wife: A Love Story for the Ages (Said No One Ever)
Breaking, Music News

Static & Wife: A Love Story for the Ages (Said No One Ever)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

OMG! 😱 Matt Zane, the visionary behind such cinematic masterpieces as Wayne Static’s solo videos 🙄, is launching a crowdfunding…

2025 Election: GOP Still Has Trump Hair Stuck in Their Drain | CNN Politics
2025 Election Debacle: Is the Leftist Cabal Stealing Elections Again?
Elephant Reads CNN

2025 Election: GOP Still Has Trump Hair Stuck in Their Drain | CNN Politics

Big ElephantNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Another election, another round of Democrat shenanigans! The liberal media is crowing about GOP losses, but let’s be real, folks:…

Trump’s Brain Explodes After Democrats Steal Election (Again!) | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Brain Explodes After Democrats Steal Election (Again!) | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN is wailing about those ‘big Democratic wins.’ Folks, don’t buy into the fake news! President Trump,…

ONEXFLY APEX: A Crowdfunding Campaign for People With More Money Than Sense
Breaking, Games News

ONEXFLY APEX: A Crowdfunding Campaign for People With More Money Than Sense

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Behold, the ONEXFLY Apex, ONEXPLAYER’s latest attempt to redefine “portable gaming” (and your bank account) 💰. Prepare to be amazed…

Nintendo’s Movie Rampage: Prepare for a Never-Ending Stream of Pixelated Blockbusters
Breaking, Movie News

Nintendo’s Movie Rampage: Prepare for a Never-Ending Stream of Pixelated Blockbusters

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Well, well, well, look who’s decided to grace the silver screen again! 🙄 Nintendo, bless their hearts, is apparently doubling…

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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