Libs Freak Out Over Awesome Border Czar’s Deportation Promise
It’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to be writing about the latest nonsense from the fake…
Month: May 2026
Compassionate Federal Judge Rules Assassin Should Get One More Shot To Kill Trump
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a landmark decision to compensate for what was described as “mistreatment” he suffered in jail,…
10 New Additions To Trump’s Presidential Fitness Test
President Donald Trump announced this week that he was reinstating the Presidential Fitness Test to evaluate the physical health…
Adam And Eve Compile Comprehensive List Of Potential Suspects In Abel’s Murder
EAST OF EDEN — After discovering the horrific murder of their son Abel, Adam and Eve sat down to…
The crew arrived immediately after the collapse
In Japan and China, a landslide of this magnitude is cleared in a single day. In the United States, it…
POV: you’re the main character and humans are just background NPCs
Hi five the cat dammit! Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…
Something crawled inside my skin when I saw that face at the end
I love how it's so quiet but not completely silent Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical…
Parents Excited To Learn What Grade They Got On Their Kid’s Science Project
SPRINGFIELD, IL — Local parents Mark and Jenna Wilkins spent the day eagerly waiting to find out what grade…
Middle Schoolers Prevent Bus Crash After Driver Blacks Out
Students from a Mississippi school banded together to prevent their bus from crashing after their driver blacked out from…
Oh Great Another Biopic About a Guy Who Ate Some Food and Died
The Anthony Bourdain biopic, because you didn’t get enough of him when he was alive and cooking up a storm…