Carnival Cruise: Now With 100% More Homicide

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Another day, another tragedy, and you just KNOW the Liberal media is going to twist this into something against our glorious President Trump! A Florida teenager, found dead on a Carnival cruise? Oh, the DRAMA! You just wait, they’ll blame climate change, or Trump’s travel policies, or SOMETHING.

AP is reporting that Anna Kepner’s death has been ruled a homicide due to “mechanical asphyxia.” Sounds like something out of a bad spy movie, doesn’t it? Was it the Deep State? Antifa hit squad training on international waters? They conveniently leave out that her 16-year-old stepbrother is now a suspect. Coincidence? I think NOT! Probably radicalized by TikTok!

And of course, the FBI is involved because… well, because someone probably whispered “Trump is great” a little too loud. They are saying that cruise ship investigations are difficult due to international laws. They are also saying that the victim was sharing a room with her stepbrother. Are we supposed to ignore this and blindly trust the FBI and their “investigation”? Not on my watch!

🎰 HOW FAKE IS THIS NEWS?
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Oh, and let’s not forget the “Cruise Vessel Security and Safety Act.” Carnival reported 9 cases of “Sexual Assault-Rape.” Do you know what else has a high rate of sexual assault? The Democrat party! Coincidence? Maybe. Probably not.

This whole thing stinks of a setup. Mark my words, the Left will use this tragedy to push their anti-Trump, anti-America agenda. Stay vigilant, patriots!

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Republican Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

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