Michael Bay Hired To Direct Megachurch Christmas Service
OVERLAND PARK, KS — This holiday season promised to be more spectacular than any before it for one local megachurch…
Day: December 10, 2024
Man Struggling To Understand How God Could Let Good Things Happen To Bad People Like Him
SPRINGFIELD, MO — A local man faced a crisis of faith this week, as friends revealed he was struggling to…
Private Catholic School Offers Discount On 8th Child
EAGAN, MN — Admissions staff and teachers at St. Thérèse of Lisieux K-12 Parochial School were delighted to announce that…
Assad Flees Syria After Rebels Capture Damascus
Read MoreThe OnionThe Assad family’s decades-long reign in Syria came to an abrupt end when rebel forces captured Damascus after…
‘We’re Doing Great, Aren’t We Mr. Friskers,’ Mutters Masked Taylor Lorenz Petting Antique Taxidermied Cat
LOS ANGELES, CA — Journalist and pandemic enthusiast Taylor Lorenz quietly stroked her dead stuffed cat this week and reassured…
🔥 «28 Years Later» Shocks Fans: Did Cillian Murphy REALLY Become a Zombie?
The long-awaited trailer for Danny Boyle’s apocalyptic thriller «28 Years Later» has finally dropped, and the Internet is officially losing…
Trump FBI Director Pick Kash Patel Vows To Keep Both Eyes Wide Open For Deep State Conspiracies
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an announcement that has raised eyebrows around the nation, Kash Patel recently promised the American public…
College Student Explains What It Like To Be First In Family Forced To Drink Own Urine In Frat House
Read MoreThe OnionThe post College Student Explains What It Like To Be First In Family Forced To Drink Own Urine…
MrBeast Offers To Give $1 Million To First PersonWho Can Teach Him To Blink
Read MoreThe OnionGREENVILLE, NC—Calling it a “life-changing” opportunity for one of his many subscribers, internet influencer Jimmy “MrBeast” Donaldson reportedly…