Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Month: July 2025

Politico hack: Trump’s brain on tariffs – a CNN dumpster fire
Elephant Reads CNN

Politico hack: Trump’s brain on tariffs – a CNN dumpster fire

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Oh, CNN is clutching their pearls because President Trump is using tariffs? Quelle surprise! It’s not “threatening,” it’s called LEVERAGE,…

Vivian Campbell’s Pre-DIO Disaster SWEET SAVAGE Announces New Album ‘Bang’ (Your Ears)
Breaking

Vivian Campbell’s Pre-DIO Disaster SWEET SAVAGE Announces New Album ‘Bang’ (Your Ears)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

OMG! 😱 The geriatric metal squad, SWEET SAVAGE, is BACK with an album called “Bang” hitting stores on September 12…

GRAND CADAVER (lol) Feat DARK TRANQUILLITY & KATATONIA Leftovers Drop New Single ‘Darkened Apathy’ (yawn)
Breaking, Music News

GRAND CADAVER (lol) Feat DARK TRANQUILLITY & KATATONIA Leftovers Drop New Single ‘Darkened Apathy’ (yawn)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

GRAND CADAVER, the Swedish “old-school” death metal “behemoth” (because apparently, they’re HUGE), featuring washed-up members from DARK TRANQUILLITY (who?), THE…

Brendan Fraser Blames Everyone But Himself For ‘The Mummy’ Reboot Flop, More At 11
Breaking, Movie News

Brendan Fraser Blames Everyone But Himself For ‘The Mummy’ Reboot Flop, More At 11

FinnJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Brendan Fraser, the king of charmingly awkward adventure, thinks Tom Cruise’s The Mummy (aka the one we all pretend didn’t…

Helene’s Revenge: Small Town Still Rockin’ the Mud Look 9 Months Later (Nailed It!)
Elephant Reads CNN

Helene’s Revenge: Small Town Still Rockin’ the Mud Look 9 Months Later (Nailed It!)

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Oh, the humanity! CNN is at it again, trying to make you believe that Hurricane Helene was some kind of…

CNN Business Says Finding a Job is Harder Than Finding a Decent Reality TV Show Since 2021
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Business Says Finding a Job is Harder Than Finding a Decent Reality TV Show Since 2021

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Oh, CNN, always with the doom and gloom! “Layoffs may not be mounting,” they say, but then whine about how…

Cuomo’s Alleged Misdeeds: Now Sponsored by the Taxpayers of New York
Elephant Reads CNN

Cuomo’s Alleged Misdeeds: Now Sponsored by the Taxpayers of New York

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Another day, another Democrat scandal! It seems former New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, a darling of the liberal elite, can’t…

Local News: Apparently America’s Gone Full-On News Diet, and Nobody Noticed
Elephant Reads CNN

Local News: Apparently America’s Gone Full-On News Diet, and Nobody Noticed

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

CNN is at it again, folks! They’re crying about a supposed “decline” in journalism, but I see it as a…

Of Ash And Steel—Twisted Metal: More Like Mildly Bent Spoon
Breaking, Games News

Of Ash And Steel—Twisted Metal: More Like Mildly Bent Spoon

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Oh, Of Ash and Steel, you had me at “indie.” Because nothing screams “AAA quality” like a game made by…

Nvidia, the $4 Trillion Overlord, Laughs Maniacally at Apple and Microsoft’s Pathetic Attempts to Keep Up
Elephant Reads CNN

Nvidia, the $4 Trillion Overlord, Laughs Maniacally at Apple and Microsoft’s Pathetic Attempts to Keep Up

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Another day, another win for American innovation under President Trump! Nvidia, the chipmaker that’s been crushing it thanks to the…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 62 63 64 … 98 Next

Latest posts

  • Choose Life. Choose Concerts. Choose Bankruptcy!
  • Californians Give Us Their Top 9 Reasons For Still Voting Democrat
  • Cómo perder todo tu dinero en el mercado de acciones americano en 5 fáciles pasos sin saber nada
  • Get Ready for the Most Epic Virtual Open Day Where Youll Probably Get Lost in a Sea of Zoom Meetings and Forget Whats Real Life Again
  • Disney Attempts To Win Star Wars Fans Back With New Jar Jar Binks Trilogy

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2025
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
2728293031  
« Jun   Aug »
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}