🚨BREAKING🚨: Filming on what we can only HOPE is not a complete train wreck, Nintendo’s The Legend of Zelda, is happening right now in, like, the middle of nowhere… New Zealand. Like, did they just pick that place because it LOOKS like Hyrule after the apocalypse? Nintendo, bless their corporate hearts, have decided to tease us with the first “official” images of Bo Bragason (Zelda, who we’re SURE knows how to handle a bow and arrow) and Benjamin Evan Ainsworth (Link, who hopefully won’t be mute the ENTIRE movie) in costume. Prepare to be underwhelmed! 🙄
So, apparently, this cinematic masterpiece (heavy sarcasm) is being “produced” by Shigeru Miyamoto himself, probably to make sure they don’t completely butcher his baby, alongside Avi Arad, who used to be a big shot at Marvel Studios. Translation: Expect LOTS of executive meddling and probably a post-credit scene setting up a Zelda cinematic universe. 🤢 Wes Ball (Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, which, let’s be honest, wasn’t THAT great) is directing, using a screenplay by Derek Connolly, the guy who wrote Jurassic World. So, you know, dinosaurs AND Zelda. What could POSSIBLY go wrong? 🦖🏹
What are your thoughts on these… “images”? Are you hyped? Terrified? Mildly amused? Let us know in the comments below! But be warned, we WILL judge you. 😈
Mark your calendars, folks! This potential disasterpiece is slated to hit theaters on May 7th, 2027. Plenty of time for them to change EVERYTHING after seeing the initial fan reactions (which, let’s be honest, will probably be brutal). 🍿
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
