So, apparently, Glenn Hughes, the guy who sang high notes that shattered glass and probably annoyed dogs, was yapping on the Thunder Underground podcast. 🙄 Apparently, someone actually listens to that. Anyway, this “legendary” bassist/vocalist – because everyone’s a legend these days – was asked if he’s gonna make more noise with Tony Iommi. You know, the dude from BLACK SABBATH who probably regrets ever working with Hughes on “Seventh Star” (1986), “Fused” (2005), and that pile of forgotten riffs called “1996 DEP Sessions” (2004). Glenn says they’re “really good friends” because, of course, everyone in rock is “family”. 🙄 More like frenemies plotting each other’s demise, amirite?
Hughes then drops the bomb that people are actually wondering if he’s screeching on Iommi’s solo album. 🤣 Newsflash: It’s not him! Probably because Iommi realized his ears deserve better. “It’s somebody else,” Hughes whines. “I don’t know who it is.” Translation: “Please, Tony, call me! I’ll do anything!” 🥺
Oh, and he had to blabber on about that “Back To The Beginning” concert in Birmingham, the supposed final nail in the coffin for Ozzy Osbourne and BLACK SABBATH. He calls them “family” again. 🙄 Right, because sharing a stage once or twice makes you blood relatives. He’s “grateful” they got a last moment. Translation: “Why wasn’t I invited? I could’ve milked that for all it’s worth!” 😂 And then he throws in the “but you never know, do you?” with a creepy laugh. Yeah, we know, Glenn, you’ll be haunting their dressing rooms until the end of time. 👻
Someone actually had the audacity to ask if Hughes would announce his own farewell tour. 🤣 As if anyone cares! He spouts some nonsense about not wanting to “sell tickets” by claiming it’s his last show. “My last show will be my last show,” he declares. Deep. So profound. 🤣 More like, “I’ll keep playing until the nursing home kicks me out.” 👴
Earlier this month, he was cornered by Eddie Trunk, who apparently still has a job, and asked about retirement. 🤣 Hughes, now 74 (OMG, Grandpa Rock!), dodges the question like a pro. “The word ‘retirement’ is something I don’t normally say.” Probably because it clashes with his ego. 😎
He then rambles about BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION and how he and Joe Bonamassa, who probably regrets starting that band, thought it was the end. But surprise! They’re “just getting started.” 🙄 Yeah, keep telling yourselves that while the rest of us yawn. They even made a “live album.” Get ready for some ear-splitting guitar solos and Hughes’s trademark screams that only dogs can hear! 🐕🦺
Hughes admits he thought about slowing down but got “reinvigorated” after the BCC tour. Translation: “I need the money!” He’s never felt so strong, he claims. 🤣 Probably because he just discovered prune juice. He’s “really looking forward to doing more shows.” Prepare yourselves, world! 🌍
Five years ago, he told the Thunder Underground podcast that he’ll keep writing music until his “final day.” 🙄 Because, of course, the world needs more Glenn Hughes songs about “recovery” and “the human condition.” As if we haven’t suffered enough. 😫
He name-drops Jagger and Plant, because, you know, he’s totally on their level. 🤣 They’re still going because they “love music.” Sure, Glenn, and you’re still going because… you love attention? 🤑
He then brags about writing “proper songs” since getting sober, all about “recovery” and “being free.” Translation: “I’m gonna milk this sobriety thing for all it’s worth.” 🙄
And now, drumroll please… Glenn’s new studio album, “Chosen,” is dropping on September 5th! 🥳 Prepare your ears for another onslaught of high-pitched vocals and generic rock riffs. You’ve been warned! 🚨
He released music videos for “Chosen,” “Voice In My Head,” and “Into The Fade.” Because who doesn’t love watching a 74-year-old rock star prancing around in a music video? 🤡
This year, Hughes is gracing Europe and South America with his presence on “The Chosen Years” tour. Get ready to relive the ’70s, whether you like it or not! 🕺
Apparently, Hughes was influenced by everything from British hard rock to THE BEATLES to American soul and R&B. Translation: “I ripped off everyone I could.” 🤣
He found “success” in TRAPEZE (who?) before joining DEEP PURPLE. He and David Coverdale “revitalized” PURPLE’s sound with “Burn.” Critics were silenced! (Or maybe they just couldn’t hear over Hughes’s screaming.) They toured the world on The Starship. Ah, the good old days of excess. 🍾
His first solo album, “Play Me Out,” was released in 1977. Groundbreaking. He formed HUGHES/THRALL. Another forgotten relic of the ’80s. He made “countless guest appearances.” Probably because no one wanted to hire him full-time. 🤷♂️
Since 1992, he’s had a “prolific solo career.” (Translation: he’s been desperately trying to stay relevant.) He’s explored everything from hard rock to funk. He’s collaborated with Chad Smith, Dave Navarro, John Frusciante. (Who probably regret it now.) He founded CALIFORNIA BREED, BLACK COUNTRY COMMUNION, and THE DEAD DAISIES. (A graveyard of rock has-beens.) 🧟
And the grand finale: Glenn collaborated with Robbie Williams on “Rocket”! 🎉 AND Iommi is on it too! A reunion! It’s a miracle! 🤣 I bet Tony wishes he had a rocket to launch himself far far away.
Glenn also joined forces with SATCHVAI! Satriani and Vai! On “I Wanna Play My Guitar”! Groundbreaking stuff. 🎸
In conclusion, Glenn Hughes is still alive, still screaming, and still trying to convince us he’s a legend. 🙄 God help us all. 🙏
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
