In a shocking turn of events, TOOL guitarist Adam Jones has confirmed that the band might, just might, stage a run of shows at the Sphere in Las Vegas, Nevada 🤯. Because, you know, they were initially asked to open the venue, but things got complicated, and U2 got the gig instead 🎸. But hey, better late than never, right? 🤷♂️. According to Adam, “We were supposed to open that place… but they have been really enthusiastic about us playing there, so we’ve been talking to them since it opened about doing some kind of residency there” 📞. Yeah, because that’s exactly what the people want – more excuses and maybes from their favorite bands 🙄.
So, it seems that TOOL is considering a residency at the Sphere, but don’t hold your breath just yet 🚫. They need to iron out some “production details and budgeting and money and timing” 🕒, which is just code for “we’re not sure if we can be bothered” 😴. But hey, if they do end up playing, it’ll be a real treat for the fans, right? 🎉. I mean, who wouldn’t want to see TOOL play at a venue with a 16K resolution wraparound screen and a powerful sound system 🎧? It’s not like they’re just trying to cash in on the venue’s immersive entertainment experiences or anything 🤑.
Earlier this year, TOOL drummer Danny Carey chatted with Spiral Out about the possibility of a residency at the Sphere 🗣️. He mentioned that the preparation for such an event is “pretty intense” 💪 and that it’s a “very expensive endeavor” 💸. Yeah, no kidding 🤑. But hey, if anyone can make it work, it’s TOOL, right? 🎸. After all, they’re a “very cinematic band” 🎥, particularly when it comes to their live shows 🎭. They’re hoping to do a stint at the Sphere after the release of their next studio album 📀, which will probably be sometime in the next decade or so 🕰️.
The Las Vegas Sphere is a fancy new venue that’s been hosting all sorts of legendary rockers 🤟, including U2, PHISH, DEAD & COMPANY, and THE EAGLES 🎸. It’s got all sorts of cool tech, like a 16K resolution wraparound screen and a powerful sound system 🎧. And, of course, TOOL would be the perfect fit for such a venue 🤔. I mean, who needs actual music when you can have a fancy light show 🎇? 🙄.
U2 opened the building with a big splash 🌊, playing to over 700,000 fans across 40 sold-out dates 🎟️. And now, METALLICA is set to add 16 dates to its Sphere residency 📆, because who doesn’t love a good residency 🤷♂️? It’s not like they’re just trying to milk the venue for all it’s worth or anything 🤑. But hey, at least they’re consistent 🙄.
TOOL’s latest LP, “Fear Inoculum”, was a big hit 🎉, debuting at No. 1 on Billboard’s Top 200 📈. And, of course, the critics loved it 🤓. I mean, who wouldn’t love a 13-year wait for an album 🕰️? 🙄. The band also released “Opiate2” 🎸, a re-imagined and extended version of the 1992 EP’s title track and an accompanying short film 🎥. Because, you know, the world was just missing a re-imagined version of a 30-year-old song 🙄.
TOOL formed in 1990 🎸, and since then, they’ve released a bunch of albums 🎶, won some Grammys 🏆, and become one of the most beloved and respected bands in the world 🙏. And, of course, they’re still going strong 🎸, with a career spanning over three decades 🕰️. So, if you’re a fan of TOOL, you should probably just go ahead and buy a ticket to their next show 🎟️, because, you know, they might actually play some music 🎸. 🤷♂️
In conclusion, TOOL might play some shows at the Sphere in Las Vegas, but don’t hold your breath 🚫. They’re a bunch of pros at making excuses and maybes 🤷♂️, but hey, at least they’re consistent 🙄. So, if you’re a fan of the band, just keep on waiting 🕰️, and maybe, just maybe, they’ll actually deliver on their promises 🎉. 🤔. But until then, you can just keep on dreaming 🌙, because that’s what fans of TOOL do best 🙏. 🎸👏
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
