Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! 🤩 Digital Extremes, bless their cotton socks, decided to grace us with more footage of Soulframe at Tennocon 2025. Yes, the fantasy game that’s totally not just Warframe with swords and sorcery. They even opened up their “pre-alpha Preludes” for the weekend! I bet it’s stable and bug-free, just like every pre-alpha should be. 🤡
So, if you’re one of the twelve people who actually registered on the game’s website (before realizing it’s probably gonna be another Warframe grind-fest), congrats! 🎉 You got in. And if you’re desperate enough to register by Sunday at 11:59 PM EST, you too can experience the “joy” of Soulframe Preludes. Until the game’s full public launch, that is. After that, it’s back to the waitlist. Because who wouldn’t want to wait for a game that’s probably gonna be free-to-play with a million microtransactions? 🤪
The Soulframe team, bless their hearts (again), took to the stage to tell us how much progress they’ve made. Which is probably measured in how many different ways they can reskin Warframe assets. They even showed off a “live gameplay demo”! I’m sure it wasn’t pre-recorded and perfectly scripted. Definitely not. 🤥 This time, we’re saving a bear named Bromius. Because bears are cool, right? 🐻
And who’s guiding us on this epic quest? Why, it’s Witch Verminia! Remember her? She’s the one who made everyone go “Wow, that’s… different” at last year’s Tennocon. And this year, she turns our Sparrow (sidekick) into a “poppet.” Because nothing says “high fantasy” like turning animals into dolls. 🧸 The audience laughed! Probably out of pity.
The demo also featured a boss fight after navigating a “corrupted forest” and an “underground maze.” Original, I know. And the Sparrow-turned-poppet plays a “unexpected role”! Like maybe it explodes or something. Who knows? Who cares? 🤷♀️
Soulframe‘s “refined gameplay” was on full display, apparently. They showed off a “new Magick-based fighting style” against the “Wazzard of the Wastes.” Sounds like someone raided a fantasy name generator. And of course, they had to shoehorn in some multiplayer co-op. Because everything is better with friends… to blame when you fail. 👯
But wait, there’s more! Customized skill progression is coming! Inspired by “medieval combat manuals”! So, you can mix and match abilities and become a melee or ranged fighter. Or a “supportive role.” Because who doesn’t love healing in a game that’s probably gonna be all about DPS? As you level up, your character makes their own “training manual.” Because reading is fun, right? 🤓
And finally, the moment we’ve all been waiting for: character customization! You’ll be able to choose from a WHOPPING eight hairstyles! 💇♀️ Eight! The possibilities are endless! More styles are “in the pipeline,” too. Probably after they figure out how to monetize them.
Soulframe is still in “pre-alpha,” which is marketing speak for “we have no idea what we’re doing.” But hey, this weekend’s influx of players will totally help them figure things out. And the game “continues to look better every time we see it.” Or maybe we’re just lowering our expectations. 🤔
Pixel P. Snarkbyte, widely regarded as the “Shakespeare of Sh*tposts,” is a video game expert with a unique knack for turning pixels into punchlines.
Born in the small town of Respawn, Pennsylvania, Pixel grew up mashing buttons on an ancient NES controller, firmly believing that “blowing into the cartridge” was a sacred ritual passed down through generations.
Pixel P. Snarkbyte: proving that life, much like a buggy open-world game, is better with a little lag-induced chaos.
