Alright, buckle up buttercups 💋, because during a riveting (read: snooze-fest😴) November 15 panel discussion at the “KISS Kruise: Landlocked In Vegas” event (yes, landlocked, genius idea💡) at the Virgin Hotels resort and casino complex in Las Vegas, the one and only Doc McGhee (who probably still rocks a Members Only jacket) talked about the upcoming documentary about KISS’s five-year, 250-date “farewell” tour. “End Of The Road,” they called it. More like “End Of My Sanity.” It all supposedly wrapped up in December of 2023 with two shows at Madison Square Garden, because nothing screams “intimate farewell” like a massive arena full of screaming, face-painted maniacs.
McGhee, bless his heart 🙄, said they tried to be a fly on the wall. “We had to do the fly-on-the-wall [approach], because if you don’t, everybody becomes actors, and it gets boring.” Oh, so the years of staged rock ‘n’ roll antics *weren’t* acting? Groundbreaking revelation, Doc! 🤯 He claims KISS is like WWE. I think he means they both involve way too much spandex and questionable storylines. They wanted to catch “the heart of KISS.” Good luck finding that under all the makeup and ego!🤡
They’ve been editing this cinematic masterpiece (I use that term loosely) for two years. Two years!⏳ You could probably learn Mandarin in that time, but no, they’re sifting through “thousands of hours” of footage. He thinks it’ll show a “whole different side of KISS.” Maybe we’ll finally see them doing their taxes or arguing over who gets the last donut🍩. He says it’ll lead into the biopic, “Shout It Out Loud,” and then the avatar show. Because when you think KISS, you think cutting-edge digital technology. 🤖
No release date yet. “One thing we’ve always tried to do is, we don’t release anything until it’s right.” That’s debatable, considering some of their album choices.🤷♀️ If it takes longer, it takes longer. They don’t *need* to make a documentary. Well, Doc, maybe consider that before filming for five freakin’ years! He wants it to be “phenomenal.” I’m betting on “mildly entertaining at best.”🍿
Even though they’re not touring anymore, Doc says the documentary, avatar show, and biopic prove the “end of the road” is nowhere in sight. Because milking a cash cow until it’s drier than the Sahara is the KISS way!💰 He’s working harder now than ever. I’m sure counting all that money is exhausting. He believes KISS will go on “way beyond all of us.” Yeah, as a cautionary tale about the dangers of over-the-top theatrics and never knowing when to quit.💀
The “farewell” trek started in January 2019 but was paused for COVID. Oh no, not the pandemic halting the most unnecessary tour in history! What a tragedy!😫
“End Of The Road” was supposed to end in July 2021. It was announced after a performance on “America’s Got Talent.” I didn’t know that show was still on.👴 Just like I didn’t know KISS was still trying to trick us with “final” tours.🤡
Doc managed BON JOVI and MÖTLEY CRÜE. Explains a lot, actually. He helped create the Moscow Music Peace Festival. Peace, love, and hairspray, man!✌️
He started managing KISS in 1995 and oversaw the reunion with Ace and Peter. That must have been a barrel of laughs🤣. 2025 marks his 30th year as their manager. Someone give this man a medal🥇… or maybe just a long vacation.🏝️
The final show at MSG included the avatar announcement. Paul Stanley said “your love, your power, has made us immortal.” More like “your money has made us digital.”🤑 The concert was streamed on PPV.COM. Because who wouldn’t want to pay to watch a “farewell” show they’ve already seen five times? 🤡
They did a previous “farewell tour” over 25 years ago. So, yeah, about that whole “farewell” thing…🤥
“KISS Kruise: Landlocked In Vegas” is happening now. Landlocked. In Vegas. I can’t get over that.🤔
This event celebrates their career and the 50th anniversary of the KISS Army. Wow, 50 years of face paint and questionable fashion choices.🥳 Performers include QUIET RIOT, Stephen Pearcy, Warren DeMartini, Bruce Kulick, Sebastian Bach, and more. A real who’s who of “bands that should have retired a decade ago.”😂
KISS canceled a Vegas residency in 2021 and 2022. Maybe because even Vegas has its limits.🤷♀️
Gene Simmons said the second MSG show would be the “final KISS-in-makeup appearance.” Don’t hold your breath waiting for that promise to come true. I have a feeling the makeup is gonna outlive us all.👻
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
