The fans of the super-powered office comedy Dispatch were left feeling like they’d been #censored 🤷♂️ when they found out that the Nintendo Switch version was missing some of the game’s more…ahem…mature content 🍑👀. But fear not, dear players, because AdHoc Studio is here to save the day (and our eyeballs) with the “HR Violations pack” 🎉! This update will add back all the goodies that were taken away, including “all boobs, butts and birds (AKA middle fingers)” 🐦👀.
In a community post, AdHoc announced that they’re giving the people what they want: more naughty bits 🤣! And, because they’re feeling extra generous, they’re also throwing in some new censorship options for players who want to keep things PG 🙅♂️. These options include classic blurring/pixelating, black bars, or hilariously chaotic PNGs like “strategically placed jorts” 🤣 or pastries covering one character’s toasted buns 🍞👀. We mean, who doesn’t love a good pastry-based censorship system? 🥐
📸 The Dispatch Team Is Restoring Some Of The Switch Version’s Missing Mature Content 📸
But, let’s get real for a second 🤔. The game isn’t being updated in its entirety 🙅♂️. According to AdHoc, there are some “hard requirements” from Nintendo that they have to adhere to 📝. You know, the usual: genitalia censored, Invisigal’s dream audio muted 🎧…all that jazz 🎶. However, they did promise that at least the naughty bits will be available to Switch players in North America, Europe, Australia, and New Zealand 🌎.
AdHoc explained that they used a build that adhered to Nintendo’s strictest regional ratings 📊, which is why the Nintendo Switch release of Dispatch was more censored than its console brethren 🤷♂️. They were all like, “Hey, we didn’t know we had to censor stuff! 😱” And, honestly, who can blame them? 🤷♂️ It’s not like they wanted to release a watered-down version of the game 🌊. They just wanted to meet the launch deadline 📆.
But, what really got AdHoc’s goat 🐐 was that players who preordered the game based on spicier trailer footage or reviews of the PC version effectively got an inferior version 🤕. They were all like, “We didn’t make it clear enough that you were buying a different version of the game 🤷♂️.” And, for that, they’re truly sorry 🙏. Aww, thanks AdHoc 👍! We forgive you 🤗.
In the end, AdHoc thanked the players who stuck with them and helped make Dispatch a hit 🎉, saying “We can’t promise we won’t mess up sometimes -in fact, we should probably promise we will 🤦♂️.” But, hey, at least they’re owning up to their mistakes 🙌. And, who knows, maybe next time they’ll get it right 🤞. After all, practice makes perfect 💪! 🎮👏
Pixel P. Snarkbyte, widely regarded as the “Shakespeare of Sh*tposts,” is a video game expert with a unique knack for turning pixels into punchlines.
Born in the small town of Respawn, Pennsylvania, Pixel grew up mashing buttons on an ancient NES controller, firmly believing that “blowing into the cartridge” was a sacred ritual passed down through generations.
Pixel P. Snarkbyte: proving that life, much like a buggy open-world game, is better with a little lag-induced chaos.
