🎄 Gothic Christmas! Why Film Critics Are Losing Their Minds Over «Nosferatu» 🦇
It’s beginning to look a lot like a bloody Christmas, thanks to Robert Eggers’ highly anticipated horror film «Nosferatu». The…
Month: December 2024
Patel, Ramaswamy To Celebrate Inauguration With Traditional Bollywood Ceremony
U.S. — To the delight of millions, President-Elect Trump has announced that future FBI Director Kash Patel and DOGE co-leader…
Study: More Americans Buying Firearms To Defend Selves From Toddlers Who Found Their Guns
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Study: More Americans Buying Firearms To Defend Selves From Toddlers Who Found Their Guns appeared first…
Anthony Fauci Announces Plans To Flee Trump’s America, Spend Rest Of His Life Making Little Fudge Cookies In A Tree
WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the transition to a new administration imminent, former Chief Medical Advisor Dr. Anthony Fauci announced plans…
Pros And Cons Of Eliminating The Department Of Education
Read MoreThe OnionPresident-elect Donald Trump promised to abolish the U.S. Department of Education. The Onion examines the pros and cons…
Nation’s Gays Say They’ll Pass On New Jaguar And Just Stick With Their Mustang Convertibles
U.S. — After the grotesque pink design of the new Jaguar was leaked to the public, the nation’s gays have…
Hunter Asks If He Can Get His Baggie Of Cocaine Back From The White House Now
WASHINGTON, D.C. — After news broke that he had received a full presidential pardon from his father for any crimes…
Paul Leaves Elf On The Shelf To Monitor Corinthian Church
CORINTH — Paul, called by the will of God to be an apostle of Christ Jesus, reportedly left an Elf…
Aaron Rodgers Takes Blame For Parts Of Game Where Jets Were Winning
Read MoreThe OnionFLORHAM PARK, NJ—Apologizing to fans and pledging to do better in the future, New York Jets quarterback Aaron…
10 Drastic Changes Kash Patel Will Make To FBI
Kash Patel is now the presumptive head of the FBI and he’s planning on some big changes. Here are just…