🎸OMG! John Norum, the dude who shreds in EUROPE (you know, that band your mom likes), has signed with Frontiers Music Srl. Apparently, he’s gonna grace us with another solo album. Prepare to be mildly impressed. 🙄
John’s guitar playing is, like, totally unique. He blends bluesy stuff with hard rock… which is basically what every guitarist since the dawn of time has done. 🤷 But hey, he’s got a “characteristic writing style”! Translation: some notes are higher than others. His “virtuosic, soulful, and imaginative playing”… Yeah, sure, whatever you say, PR guy. 😴
Norum dropped his first solo album, “Total Control” (because subtlety is for losers), way back in 1987. He’s churned out nine of these bad boys since then. His latest, “Gone To Stay” (because all the good titles were taken?), came out in 2022. Bet you didn’t even know, did you? 😂
Word on the street is John’s been hanging out with DEEP PURPLE’s Glenn Hughes, Don Dokken, and other “top-notch musicians.” Translation: he needed some famous names to boost sales. Expect a bunch of “international guest appearances” on the new album. Because nothing says “solo album” like a dozen other dudes hogging the spotlight. 🤡
He’s planning to play live, both solo and with EUROPE, in 2026. EUROPE is also recording their twelfth album 💿 and plotting a “The Final Countdown” 40th-anniversary tour. 🗓️Because milking nostalgia is the only way to stay relevant, am I right? 🐄
John is “thrilled” about signing with Frontiers. “I’m super excited about the new songs!” he gushes. Translation: “Please buy my album so I can afford a new guitar pick.” 💸
Aldo Lonobile from Frontiers is “excited” to welcome John. “An iconic guitarist!” he proclaims. Translation: “We needed someone, anyone, to sign. And he was available.” 🤝
Born in Norway and adopted by Sweden (talk about an identity crisis 😵), John started playing guitar at 10. At 12, he formed DRAGONFLY. At 14, he joined Swedish rocker Eddie Meduza. At 16, he was in WC. Basically, he’s been trying to make it big since before you were born. 👶
Then FORCE became EUROPE. 🏆They won some contest in 1982. And the rest, as they say, is history (that most people have forgotten). 👴
With EUROPE, John recorded a bunch of albums and toured the world. They even won awards! 🥇 Like “Comeback Of The Year” in 2015. Translation: “We didn’t break up, so… yay?” 🎉
John’s “parallel solo projects” started in 1987. He moved to the U.S. and hung out with Hughes and Dokken. He also played in DOKKEN. So basically, he was a session musician for other people’s bands. 🤷
As a solo artist, John has nine albums, a live album, and collaborations with Dokken. His “distinctive singing” and “guitar playing style” are “widely and consistently appreciated.” Translation: Some people somewhere might like it. Maybe. 🤔
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
