Alright, headcases, or should I say, empty-headed cases? 🤡 Your supreme overlord, Robb Flynn, has graced you with news of a MACHINE HEAD “An Evening With…” European tour in the spring of 2026. Three hours, you say? Without support acts? Prepare for an exhaustive set of the same four anthems, some deep cuts only Robb remembers, and plenty of time for him to talk about himself. Again. 🙄
Flynn, in his infinite wisdom, has bestowed upon us a soliloquy: “Head Cases, I’ve been thinking a lot about what makes a MACHINE HEAD show… a MACHINE f**kin’ HEAD show.” Yeah, we know, Robb. It’s the riffs that sound suspiciously like Pantera, the circle pits where you can lose your wallet, the sweat that smells like cheap beer, and the chaos fueled by overpriced merchandise. 🍻 But fear not, there’s more! It’s the singing, apparently.
“The way you take our songs… songs we wrote in a cold Oakland rehearsal room, in dark places, in moments of pain, struggle, or heartbreak — and you turn them into something bigger. Something yours.” Oh, please. We’re pretty sure those “dark places” were just your accountant’s office after seeing the royalties from “Through the Ashes of Empires.” 😂
“I’ve stood on stages all over the world, guitar hanging off my shoulder, lights blinding my eyes, sweat dripping down my face… and then I hear it: You. All of you. Singing louder than the PA. Singing like the song belongs to you — and it does. That feeling… I can’t compare it to anything else in my life.” We’re pretty sure you can compare it to the feeling of your bank account swelling after each ticket sale, Robb. 💰
“There was a show a while back — honestly, I can’t even remember what city it was — but during ‘Darkness Within’, the crowd came in so strong on that first line I actually stepped back from the mic. Just… let it happen. And as I listened, I felt something shift inside me. Like, this is why we’re here. This connection. This shared voice. It’s not a performance anymore. It becomes a conversation. A communion. And that’s why we’re doing this tour.” Yeah, a conversation where you talk and we listen (or pretend to). A communion where we worship at the altar of Robb Flynn. Got it. 🙏
“No openers. No limits. Just 3 hours of anthems, deep cuts, ragers & epics, the songs you’ve screamed so loud we could feel it in our bones.” Translation: Three hours of Robb playing whatever he feels like, regardless of what you actually want to hear. Deep cuts? Prepare for B-sides you’ve actively forgotten. Ragers? Probably just “Davidian” on repeat. 🤘
“I want these nights to feel like those rare shows where everything clicks and the world falls away. Where we can dig into the catalog, take our time, talk, play, improvise, go places we haven’t gone in years… or ever. I want to see you jump until the floor shakes. I want to hear those first words of ‘Halo’ explode like a war cry. I want to hear that massive ‘Let freedom ring’ during ‘Davidian’ that rattles the walls. I want to feel the whole room move as one.” Translation: He wants you to do all the work while he stands there and soaks up the adulation. Good luck with that. 🙄
“These are the nights where the band and the fans become the same damn thing.” Yeah, the same damn thing: exploited. 😈
“Pre-sale tickets start today. I hope you’ll be there with us. I hope you’ll bring your voice. Because we’re going to need it.” He needs your voice to drown out the sound of his ego. Bring earplugs too. 🎧
MACHINE HEAD 2026 “An Evening With…” European tour dates:
April 11 – Copenhagen – Vega (Denmark)
April 13 – Hamburg – Inselparkhalle (Germany)
April 15 – Warsaw – Progresja (Poland)
April 17 – Zwickau – Stadthalle (Germany)
April 18 – Berlin – Columbiahalle (Germany)
April 19 – Vienna – Gasometer (Austria)
April 20 – Munich – Tonhalle (Germany)
April 22 – Milan – Alcatraz (Italy)
April 23 – Marseille – Espace Julien (France)
April 24 – Balma – Interference (France)
April 25 – Villava – Sala Totem Aretoa (Spain)
April 27 – Madrid – Sala Riviera (Spain)
April 28 – Lisbon – Lav Lisboa Ao Vivo (Portugal)
April 29 – Malaga – Sala Paris 15 (Spain)
April 30 – Barcelona – Razzmatazz (Spain)
May 02 – Paris – L’Olympia (France)
May 03 – Strasbourg – La Laiterie (France)
May 04 – Saarbrucken – Saarlandhalle (Germany)
May 06 – Ludwigsburg – MHP Arena (Germany)
May 07 – Wiesbaden – Schlachthof Wiesbaden (Germany)
May 08 – Cologne – Palladiu (Germany)
May 09 – Fribourg – Fri-Son (Switzerland)
May 11 – Tilburg – Escape Room 013 (Netherlands)
May 12 – Brussels – Ancienne Belgique (Belgium)
May 14 – Glasgow – O2 Academy Glasgow (United Kingdom)
May 15 – Manchester – O2 Victoria Warehouse (United Kingdom)
May 16 – Wolverhampton – Civic At The Halls (United Kingdom)
May 17 – London – O2 Academy Brixton (United Kingdom)
In other news, guitarist Reece Alan Scruggs had a perfectly valid reason to skip a tour but is back now! 🎸 Vogg is gone now after temporarily saving the band. 👋 Reece made his live debut with MACHINE HEAD in November 2022. 🎉
MACHINE HEAD’s eleventh studio album, “Unatoned,” came out in April 2025. We’re sure it was groundbreaking and not at all derivative. 🙄💿
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
